I am from a society where women have lost their identity.

I am from a country where women and objects are alike.


Our mothers at birth teach us to be marginalized and divided.



We are building a society where dreams once have lost their color.

With my mother I learned the art of being a woman.

Cook, clean, do laundry, work.

With my mother I learned to take care of a child, girl or boy.

With my mother my brothers learned the art of being a man.

Finding excuses, use, handle, break.

With my mother I have not known how I was strong, powerful.

I did not know that the society is a reflection of my work as a woman.

Because with my mother and mothers before her, the men expressed stronger, they are adored and provide no effort.

Women are weaker, are working without rest and are despised.

Our society is the result of the education given to our boys and girls.

Our society is the product of our working woman ...


So woman I assume to be.

Yesterday is a dream past, a history.

Today is what tomorrow will be.

And today I know…

Woman I am.


Dear Pumpkin,

What powerful words you speak here! Your descriptions are so vivid. It is so true that in many of our communities our women are still helping the marginalization and the limitations on other women, but we need to encourage each other to bring out that strength that every woman has inside, to let that voice and fire out to teach each other that we can start with changing ourselves. Thank you for sharing.


Dear Pumpkin,

Thank you for sharing these powerful images! Your words really show how systemic the marginalization of women is in your community, but they also show your resilience and perseverance.

I am looking forward to learning more about your journey and your passions.


Thanks Kaitlinl for your encouragement.

My passion is to transform women and change their story. Looking forward to knowing you too

Hello Pumpkin,

Thank you for sharing this powerful story.  As I read this, the song "Just like Fire" by Pink came on the radio and part of the chorus goes like this...

Just like fire, burning out the way If I can light the world up for just one day Watch this madness, colorful charade No one can be just like me any way Just like magic, I'll be flying free

I could not help but think that despite what you see in your surroundings there has been a spark that has been lit within you and as you grow in strength, you will also be flying free.


Hi, Pumpkin.

I love your piece.  I read it aloud because it looked like poetry and it is poetry filled with power, fire, inspiration for you and all who will read it.  Growing up I struggled with the example my mother showed me but as I got older I found strength within myself to become something/someone new, strong and ALIVE.  You are the voice of the future unfolding.  Thanks for writing with so much passion and insight.




Dear Pumpkin,

Indeed, they are strong words that represent, unfortunately, most of the experience(s) I had, have and that see in others as well.

Your words describe so well what many women go through generation by generation and still, after so much time, there is such a long way to go.

I see girls and young women in my country that simply avoid reality, the one is in front of them and in them, and choose prefabricated stories and shape their own lives and identities to conform to that image they have of reality in their own heads. This brings us even further from mending the harsh realities that surround us.

Your words simplify reality in a way many shy away from with very unfortunate consequences.

Ana MC Budeanu

Legal Consultant, LLM


Very true Ana,

If you meet me,you cant suspect that my heart has been crashed,I smile like nothing has never happened to me ,but one thing am learning as long as you keep it to yourself you cant help someone else going through similar situation out there

Dear Pumpkin,thank you being a strong woman,indeed women can change the world.this disclosing how women are treated or marginalized you community show your strength because many women are being treated unfairly but thy can't out to raise their voice hence keep on dying silently .i really love your piece.keep it up go harder.

Dear Pumpkin,

I still hear it all around me even from the educated woman, "Nkechi, go to the kitchen and wash the plates", "go sweep the house", "your brother is crying, go and change his napkin". Nkechi will reply, "but mama, i am watching TV with my twin brothers, Obinna and Ikenna".  Mama will thunderously call out, "Come on, go and do those things, don't you know they are boys?" We are told by our mothers from the cradle that we belong to the kitchen.

Let us all come together to put a stop to all this.  We are influenced so much by our parents.  My father was instrumental to who i am today.  He instilled in me boldness so that i can speak up for myself and others. I am proud to be a woman today, because i was told by my father that i can do anything I set out to do better than the boys. And indeed, I did.

Yes we can!


Harriet C Okoro

Executive Director

Ruldin-Society for Neglected Women of Nigeria

Hi Pumpkin

Woooow, This is truly amazing an dyes i agree with you that we learn to be women form our mothers. We learn from our mothers experiences and mistakes and these are lessons that will never leave us the same. Thank you for reminding us because today is surely what tomorrow will be.

Stay blessed my dear sister

Mrs. Anita Kiddu Muhanguzi Head of Legal and Advocacy Centre for Batwa Minorities a.kiddu@gmail.com cfmlegal@gmail.com Skype: mrs_muhanguzi