1. My first job was working in an Orange Juice factory, but I got canned.  Couldn't concentrate.     2. Then I worked in the woods as a Lumberjack, but just couldn't hack it, so they gave me the ax.  3. After that, I tried being a Tailor, but wasn't suited forit-mainly because it was a sew-sew job, and people liked to hem and haw about the price.     4. Next, I tried working in a Muffler Factory, but that was too exhausting.  5. Then, tried being a Chef - figured it would add a little spice to my life, but just didn't have the thyme.  6. Next, I attempted being a Deli Worker, but any way I sliced it.... couldn't cut the mustard.  7. My best job was a Musician, but eventually found I wasn't noteworthy.  8. I studied a long time to become a Doctor, but didn't have any patience.  9. Next, was a job in a Shoe Factory. Tried hard but just didn't fit in.   10. I became a Professional Fisherman, but discovered I couldn't live on my net income. 

11. Managed to get a good job working for a Pool Maintenance Company, but the work was just too draining.   12. So then I got a job in a Workout Center, but they said I wasn't fit for the job. 13. After many years of trying to find steady work, I finally got a job as a Historian - until I realized there was no future in it.  14. My last job was working in Starbucks, but had to quit because it was the same old grind.    15. SO, I TRIED RETIREMENT AND I FOUND I'M PERFECT FOR THE   JOB - LOVE IT!!!!!