School of Sympathy

«If you became a victim of the home violence or sexual assault, please, call our hotline and you’ll receive a free psychological help. Anytime. Any day».

I often see such advertisements in local public transport. They make my wonder: why do we only struggle the consequences instead of trying to avoid the preconditions? Of course it’s easier to create an anonymous phone service then to change the legislation and secure women from the legal point of view. But this way of solving the problem becomes a reason for Ukrainian women rather to complain then to fight for their rights.

Frankly speaking, I can consider myself as a lucky enough girl. I grew up in a lovely family and never experienced physical violence; neither did most of my friends. But as soon as you leave Kyiv and head to any of the villages, the pattern changes. You can meet divorced girls aged 19 and 22-year-old mothers of two or three children. Some of them don’t mind their health, education and even appearance, because they have no money and time for that. Finally they become overweighed, unattractive, irritable and divorced again. Girls weep, start drinking alcohol and finally stop controlling their lives.

Having realized, that’s it’s up to me to create my own lifeline, I browse for international projects for getting proper education in media and social politics. Finally I’ve found this community and enjoy being a part of it. I appreciate each comment and reply, which I get here – they help me understand that my stories are touching and deserve being published. I’m impressed and admire these brave women, who teach me how to behave and cope with the difficulties. Here I learn how to be tolerant in political, gender and intercultural issues, how to be free of stereotypes and think without prejudices. By the way, it really helps in my job.

Frankly speaking, it’s difficult for me to find friends among women in real life – sometimes I’m just too shy and don’t know how to start a conversation. VOF is a School of Sympathy for me – sometimes I wipe my eyes while reading some blogs. Such kind of female community helps each of us to understand: we are wonderful and gifted! We deserve love, despite of their age, country and laws. And with such a support we can make our dreams real. I want to thank this society, because only here I’m not afraid to be misunderstood. It’s not a reality show with tearful revelations, but true life, where each word is real.

Spending time with unloved man, watching soap operas and drinking brandy on my own in a small kitchen? That’s not for me. And since I'm here, my future will definitely be different.