One of the teachers told me, a few days before that there was a wedding in our village and younger brother of groom said to his mother that if you want to go for a shopping, take any girl from the village to join you but our own young ladies from the family cannot go to Bazaar with you, as we do not want stranger men to look at them.

And these are the men who beat, insult, humiliate and give names to their women in front of any one, who feel proud if they have many women in their own life, they feel proud to give remarks about women of other families.

When a woman gets pregnant first time she prays to have a son so that her seat as a wife can be confirmed otherwise her husband has a right to get married to another woman and her in-laws will favor her husband in this decision.

In villages still they hang green leaves on door of the house when a baby boy takes a birth in that house, it mean that a blessing, power and prosperity has taken a birth, they distribute sweets which mean celebration and happiness.

But when this is a baby girl there will be a mourn in the house, mother will feel ashamed and father will feel weak and angry.

Think about that girl who takes birth in such scenario and after birth she will be given a training that how she will become a good wife and this is an only purpose of her life.

When woman come to my school they say very proudly that our daughters never go out of home at any cost which means they are very respected and those who go out are not good girls.

Women are in prison, they have no access to knowledge, to healthy diet and what is happening in the world, they just have to live in the house to do house hold and to offer their prayers.

But our society does not understand one thing that their future, their children are in the hands of these mothers, who do not know anything about the world, who do not know that we have a right to dream, to set a goal in life, to find ways to make it a reality, they do not know that their children can do many things in life.

 They think that to do art, to play games , to watch sports is just a wasting of time, who think that only God will do everything for them and they just have to pray because this is what they are being taught, they feel pride in suffering, they take it as an honor that they do not go out without permission of their men, they sleep, wake up, take a shower, eat, speak, smile , talk to someone, wear clothes, get education, decide subjects  only of their men’ choice.

Men cannot give birth to a child and men cannot give them a proper brought up as a mother can do, but if you give such atmosphere to the mothers what you think they will deliver to the coming generations?

As a result our most people are angry because they do not have right to express themselves. They are followers because they are being taught to just follow and say yes on anything, they believe that women are a property of men because this is what they have seen since childhood, they get afraid of a change, they practice painful rituals because they do not have courage to speak against them and to raise a question.

When those children grow up, girls get married and men have to work to support their family and to do this they have to look for shortcuts for which they do all types of crimes, they take bribe, they speak lies, they do corruption, these crimes put them into a fear, this fear makes them frustrated, this frustration makes then angry, this anger gives birth to the beating, humiliation, discrimination and these things destroys the peace and destroys the whole society.

I know and I believe it that when women will be educated and they will have an access to all kind of knowledge. They will have a power to take decisions; they will have freedom to choose what they want in their lives.

 Then they will pass on their skills to their children and this is how our society will become a society where there will be a respect for women, everyone will be confident and hardworking, they will not get angry because they will not only have freedom but will know the ways to make their dreams come true.

I live in this society but my parents gave me education and freedom to take a decision so I was able to educate and empower hundreds of women in my society if I alone can make this impact with education and freedom, imagine if all women will have this right the entire world will be changed in just one generation.

Let us invest on women because life and a good life on this earth are not possible without women.

 

 

 

 

1Encouragement

Hello Sister Zeph - Thank you so much for sharing your thoughts, opinions, and observations about the vital importance of educating girls and women in Pakistan.  This is a very passionate and informative piece of writing that raised a lot of emotions in me.  You write that "when this is a baby girl there will be a mourn in the house, mother will feel ashamed and father will feel weak and angry."  That is a very sad reality in your country, and I can see very clearly that you are determined to educate your people so that social & cultural traditional thinking can change.

In your profile I read that at the age of 13 you took a stand for the rights of women and  started a free school in the court yard of your home, and during last sixteen years, you not only taught 600 girls but empowered more than 300 girls by teaching them skills.  In my opinion, you are an amazing example of determination and vision as you work tirelessly to bring about the status of women through education and empowerment.