Rage is a sign of helplessness. The more ways in which we can empower each other, the safer our world will become. This is why I so value the ways the world is opening up to the truths of each others’ real lives, through use of the internet and networks like World Pulse. There are now so many ways to find friends and those who help to encourage and educate us.

I have lost a woman who was, by her young son, unwittingly set up for murder by her son’s father. The gunman then turned the gun on himself, as the son watched his mother dying in the street. The two had been in an abusive marriage, on both sides of the couple, for many years, and this is how it ended.

Her mother had an abusive husband, saw the abuse of her daughter, and stayed silent. Her mother was dependent on this daughter for financial support that would have been jeopardized in divorce.

I have stood between several friends and family members and their abusers, only to have the abusers turned on me by those I protected. In some of the cases, I understood why the larger of the couple, usually the male, was driven to want to strike out at his partner. His woman continued taunting him even when she knew he was about to explode.

The man simply did not have the right to do so, but was taught that drawing the blood of one more vulnerable than oneself is the “manly,” “adult,” and often said “Godly” way to assert authority. These same women saw bright red men’s handprints placed on the flesh of their children by the man, and said nothing.

How many of us see adult hands, both male and female, raised in rage toward helpless children and believe it is a parental right to use violence to train a child? Boys in my culture are beaten and told to “become a man” when they admit to pain. If a boy cries, he is usually beaten more severely and ridiculed.

When a girl is beaten, she may use tears to stop the beatings. This often leads to displays of affection when the tears are flowing, thus combining violence with affection in the minds of children. In my culture, for couples, it is called it “make up sex.”Many quote Biblical verses to justify these actions.

It is not only fathers who use physical violence against those who are vulnerable. Mothers also are guilty of these actions, and mothers often feign helplessness that further enrages the males being verbally abused.

In my culture, it was common for men to be taught never to strike a woman, but both parents were encouraged to strike children. “Spare the rod and spoil the child.”

The great question, in my mind, is “When will we stop behaving as animals without developed human brains? A man, to my mind, is one who spends his time in making the world a better and safer place, through his education and actions. This is actually my definition of all who wish to claim that we are truly human.

We don’t need any more animals on earth using sex and violence as weapons and ways to control others. We could use more true humans who bond to others with compassion that makes for lifelong respect and potential for equal partnerships.

There are no good wars, as war always leads to revenge, which creates more children to be fed to the cycle. Waging war is a way to keep humans feeling helpless. Helplessness leads to rage. We must stop bearing babies for the war machines.

Perhaps generations past believed that faith included fear and constant procreation. There are many more ways to “Go forth; be fruitful, and multiply.” Woks of compassion create real conversions. World Pulse has thousands of members in 190 countries as testament to this truth.

It is time that we reject fear as a form of love. We simply need to know that choosing the energy of The Eternal Sacred Spirit is what makes homo sapiens into human beings, and that gender-free worldwide compassion is the only answer to violence.

We can do it when we combine our voices in a new spirit’s song.

I have lost a woman who was, by her young son, unwittingly set up for murder by her son’s father. The gunman then turned the gun on himself, as the son watched his mother dying in the street. The two had been in an abusive marriage, on both sides of the couple, for many years, and this is how it ended.

Her mother had an abusive husband, saw the abuse of her daughter, and stayed silent. Her mother was dependent on this daughter for financial support that would have been jeopardized in divorce.

I have stood between several friends and family members and their abusers, only to have the abusers turned on me by those I protected. In some of the cases, I understood why the larger of the couple, usually the male, was driven to want to strike out at his partner. His woman continued taunting him even when she knew he was about to explode.

The man simply did not have the right to do so, but was taught that drawing the blood of one more vulnerable than oneself is the “manly,” “adult,” and often said “Godly” way to assert authority. These same women saw bright red men’s handprints placed on the flesh of their children by the man, and said nothing.

How many of us see adult hands, both male and female, raised in rage toward helpless children and believe it is a parental right to use violence to train a child? Boys in my culture are beaten and told to “become a man” when they admit to pain. If a boy cries, he is usually beaten more severely and ridiculed.

When a girl is beaten, she may use tears to stop the beatings. This often leads to displays of affection when the tears are flowing, thus combining violence with affection in the minds of children. In my culture, for couples, it is called it “make up sex.”Many quote Biblical verses to justify these actions.

 It is not only fathers who use physical violence against those who are vulnerable. Mothers also are guilty of these actions, and mothers often feign helplessness that further enrages the males being verbally abused.

In my culture, it was common for men to be taught never to strike a woman, but both parents were encouraged to strike children. “Spare the rod and spoil the child.”

The great question, in my mind, is “When will we stop behaving as animals without developed human brains? I don’t taunt animals larger than I am. I am not attracted to “naughty” boys. I know that all animals are drawn to the urge to procreate, but I know my limits and defend myself from having more responsibilities than I could handle.

A man, to my mind, is one who spends his time in making the world a better and safer place, through his education and actions. This is actually my definition of all who wish to claim that we are truly human.

We don’t need any more animals on earth using sex and violence as weapons and ways to control others. We could use more true humans who bond to others with compassion that makes for lifelong respect and potential for equal partnerships.

There are no good wars, as war always leads to revenge, which creates more children to be fed to the cycle. Waging war is a way to keep humans feeling helpless. Helplessness leads to rage. We must stop bearing babies for the war machines.

Perhaps generations past believed that faith included fear and constant procreation. There are many more ways to “Go forth; be fruitful, and multiply.” Woks of compassion create real conversions. World Pulse has thousands of members in 190 countries as testament to this truth.

It is time that we reject fear as a form of love. We simply need to know that choosing the energy of The Eternal The Sacred Spirit is what makes homo sapiens into human beings, and that gender-free worldwide compassion is the only answer to violence.

We can do it when we combine our voices in a new spirit’s song.

Take action! This post was submitted in response to The Path to Participation Initiative from World Pulse and No Ceilings.

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Comments

Thank you Y for your indepth, articulate, sharing on the cycle of abuse and it's "many faces" (forms).   The photo of the man in a screaming rage at the top of your journal entry is all too familiar to me.  I saw that look many times in the face of my father and  my husband spiraling out of control.  Blaming. Projecting fault.  I was finally able to get away from it after nearly 20 years of marriage, and have been relieved and at peace ALONE for the past 15 years! I thank you for how succinct you were in your outining of the phenomenon of violence that is inbedded in both men and women, as both perpetrators and victims,  since the beginning of time.  In order to surpass this and reach peace, I concur:  We can do it when we combine our voices in a new spirit’s song.

Thank you for your voice, Y.

 

"I see you"

In peace and solidarity ~ strength

Namaste,

Veronica