One Bead At A Time - From Self Healing To Purpose: A Journey Of Transformation

Andra Marasteanu
Posted December 22, 2019 from Jersey
NadrArt - Faith
NadrArt
NadrArt: AscensiONE, My Sacred Self, Faith, Anastasis, Immersion -Chaude Memoirs (1/2)

 11 Years ago I discovered beads, and they uncovered  me. I was led to them. I was guided to step into a magnificent limitless world that turned out to be my inner world and the entire Universe at the same time. One bead at a time I weaved my story, my life, my self. I cried, I laughed, I healed, I grew, I forgave, I inspired, I loved, I was transformed, I found my purpose.

Writing now, it’s difficult to find the starting point.

The starting point with my journey with beads - maybe it was in fact when my mom came home from Turkey, where she spent her annual leave working, with a bag of pearls and strings and clasps and other findings and I tried to play with them and combine them with beads from other broken strands of beads she kept. Or maybe it was in the way she always wore her beads with pride and joy, in a grey and confused world in the post-communism era in Romania. Or maybe it was when I finally discovered my voice, the way I spoke best, through writing the stories of my jewellery pieces. 

The starting point of my healing journey - maybe it was when I decided to go inside and do the work as I felt that there are hidden things inside me that don’t let me shine. Or maybe when I started (what later I discovered is called) the active meditation through drawing and designing as a child and then beading, crafts and intuitive art as a young woman. Maybe when I read religious and spiritual books ever since I was a child, confident that there is more than we usually perceive and curious about the immense astonishing love energy that created everything and that I felt with every breath. Maybe when I chose again and again not to let the world change me, to make me someone I am not when all the love I thought this world consists of was in fact suffering, and tears, and rejections, and wounding, and struggle, and anxiety - a world unsafe for a child, for a girl, for a woman.

The starting point of my story - maybe it was with the first unwanted intimate touch  from a man when I was a child, or maybe with the first man that abandoned me - my father, maybe it was with the first forced sexual experience - my then “liked by everybody “ boyfriend, maybe it was with the first violence against women I witnessed- my parents, maybe it was with the first abuse I suffered from a man in power- my teacher, maybe it was with the first man that hit me for not doing what he wanted, maybe it was in fact being born in a society that chose to turn a blind eye and treat everything lightly  when it came to women and their experiences.

Or maybe all. And maybe even before that, before me, before time.

I was raised a lioness and not a kitten, as my mom told me. I was raised strong and kind and forgiving and loving and caring and determined and ambitious and daring and purpose driven and mission oriented. I asked to be the light, the pen with which the creator writes his love story to the world. I prayed for the destructive process of being completely stripped of everything I was not, of everything the society and other people made me believe I was. And I was guided and supported with every step, with every bead I weaved my experience and my being.

Every single piece of jewellery I made talks about me, my stories, my experiences, my journey, my healing, my passions, my interests, my beliefs, my emotions, my darkness and my light, my transformation, my unbecoming, my love. 

I used art and crafts to heal myself, to free myself. But this chapter has ended. And a new one begins. A new journey of shining my light upon this world, using my knowledge, my passions, my skills, my interests and my experiences to be of service. I struggled for the past couple of years with finding a deeper meaning of my art expression, a reason to continue doing it that will make a greater difference. Beads will still weave my story, but this time they’re weaving MY path, my purpose, my mission. And it’s still about healing and freeing and unbecoming, but not about me anymore, but about others, about the world, about the children and women that are most vulnerable in one of the most unsafe countries in the world, Pakistan . 

My story is not MY story, it’s OUR story. It’s a story of LOVE, from suffering through healing to purpose. 

 

This story was submitted in response to Art for Change.

Comments 23

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Lisbeth
Dec 22, 2019
Dec 22, 2019

Dear Andra,
A very warm welcome to World pulse with a big congrats on your first post.
I loved wearing beads too but I never attached so much meaning as you just made me feel :-).

I am much into the combination in my dressing haha. You are such an amazing writer. The way you link beads with Passion and love is so splendid.

The opening image are those designed by you? Wow! You do it passionately indeed.
Will look forward to your subsequent posts.
Have a great week and warm regards
Lizzy

Andra Marasteanu
Dec 23, 2019
Dec 23, 2019

My dear Lizzy, thank you so much for your warm welcome and kind appreciation!
Before I started beading I never thought of what they could bring me. But I received one of the most precious gifts through them.
Thank you, these are some of my beloved creations I put so much soul in.
I am looking forward to writing more too.
Have a wonderful week as well!

Lisbeth
Dec 23, 2019
Dec 23, 2019

It's so splendid :-). You are most welcome

Andra Marasteanu
Dec 24, 2019
Dec 24, 2019

Thank you

Anita Shrestha
Dec 22, 2019
Dec 22, 2019

Dear Sister'
Thank you for your creative work, keep it continue

Andra Marasteanu
Dec 23, 2019
Dec 23, 2019

Thank you so much, Anita. I will!

Karen Quiñones-Axalan
Dec 23, 2019
Dec 23, 2019

Hello, Andra,

Welcome to World Pulse! It’s great that you finally posted your firsr story, too!

It’s always a joy to know that a new voice is rising up, and you are a voice from Jersey! Wow! Welcome, dear!

Your creations are elegant and beautiful! I love beaded jewelries. In fact, on 2016, my husband and I bought a lot of beads and books about beading. We spent our Christmas vacation learning to make necklaces and bracelets then gave these to our family and friends as presents. Sad to say, when I got pregnant, then moved to another city, we didn’t have enough time to continue this. But the desire to create is still there, probably when my children are older.

This resonates with me, “Every single piece of jewellery I made talks about me, my stories, my experiences, my journey, my healing, my passions, my interests, my beliefs, my emotions, my darkness and my light, my transformation, my unbecoming, my love. ”

Wow! This shows what a beautiful woman you are!

Thank you for sharing a glimpse of intricate stories that made you become who you are today. I hope to know more about your journey. Please continue writing!

Have a great day! Merry Christmas!

Andra Marasteanu
Dec 23, 2019
Dec 23, 2019

Thank you for the warm welcome and beautiful kind words, Karen!
I am so happy to learn that you do beading as well. If the desire is there, you will return to it for sure when the time is right. The past couple of years I haven't bead much, but it is always there, waiting for me to find the stories to weave. And I feel that it's time for me to take it to another level.
I will continue writing, I have so many things to share and, although I only have glimpses of it, my journey is going to be a very interesting one. Thank you for encouraging me in this direction.
You have a merry and blessed Christmas as well! Take care

Karen Quiñones-Axalan
Dec 25, 2019
Dec 25, 2019

You’re welcome, dear sister.

Yes, I am still a beginner, though. So I can make simple ones for now. I’m excited to read more about your beading journey and your life stories, too!

Yes, please write them because you have no idea how many women you’ll be inspiring. Have a great day! Merry Christmas!

Andra Marasteanu
Dec 25, 2019
Dec 25, 2019

Beginner and simple are still amazing <3
I will write, thank you so much for encouraging me!
Merry Christmas, my dear!

Karen Quiñones-Axalan
Dec 26, 2019
Dec 26, 2019

You’re welcome, dear sister!

Wendye Savage
Dec 23, 2019
Dec 23, 2019

Very touching story.

Andra Marasteanu
Dec 23, 2019
Dec 23, 2019

Thank you, my dear Wendye! I am happy that it resonated with you!

Jill Langhus
Dec 23, 2019
Dec 23, 2019

Hi Andra,

Welcome to World Pulse, dear:-) Wow! I absolutely love your beaded creations! You are so talented. Thanks so much for sharing your beautiful jewelry photos and also your intricate past, too. I'm looking forward to seeing what the next chapter holds for you and what your vision and mission are for your work with Pakistan. Do you have a Behance profile? I would love to see it and follow your work, too!

Hope you're doing well and having a great day!

Andra Marasteanu
Dec 23, 2019
Dec 23, 2019

Thank you , my dear Jill! I am really happy to be here and that my beaded creations are so appreciated. My past is just a part of the story, that shaped me and served as a starting point so I can now be fully equipped for the next wonderful chapters of my life. I am very keen and determined on following my path that builds with every step I make. I am really blessed with all my experiences, past, present and future.
I don't have a Behance profile, yet, but I will have a look, thank you!!
I hope you are doing well as well and you will have lovely holidays! I am enjoying this time of the year for its spiritual gifts of inner balance and love.

Jill Langhus
Dec 25, 2019
Dec 25, 2019

You're very welcome, dear:-)

Yes, and that's a great way to look at it!

Okay. Let me know if you create one. I have one:-)

Thanks! You, too:-)

XX

Andra Marasteanu
Dec 25, 2019
Dec 25, 2019

I created the profile, let's see when I find time to post some things there. :D
It actually looks like an amazing platform.

xx

Jill Langhus
Dec 27, 2019
Dec 27, 2019

Oh, great:-) Looking forward to seeing your creations:-)

Yes, it is!

Akshaya9
Dec 23, 2019
Dec 23, 2019

Hi Andra,
Welcome here in World Pulse and congratulations to your first story.
I'm doing beaded jewelry before when i was 13 years old, my cousin thought me. We do ring, bracelets and necklaces (simple design)but later on we stop doing it because of busy in studies and no budget to do. I love beaded jewelry to wear specially the bracelet :-). I love your creations and design dear.
Thank you for sharing your story.

Have a nice day dear and Merry Xmas.

Andra Marasteanu
Dec 24, 2019
Dec 24, 2019

Thank you so much, Akshaya!
I am happy to hear that you are making jewellery as well, but even more so that you are focusing on your studies. Good luck with that.
You have a lovely merry Christmas as well, dear!

Akshaya9
Dec 25, 2019
Dec 25, 2019

Your welcome dear :-)

Have a nice day.

Conny Shamu
Jan 23
Jan 23

Wooow you create beautiful things
Love your story.

Regards Conny

Andra Marasteanu
Jan 23
Jan 23

Thank you so much, Conny! I am happy that it you love them ^_^