I have grown up in a small household. Although, my father is an educated man he constantly abuses me verbally and physically. I hated abusive words too much that it was shaken my whole soul inside. Maybe he knew it, that is why he was doing so to provoke me. After being physically and psychologically abused by my own father I was going to a small attic where my most hours were spent when I was home because these abuses were constantly. I was asking myself as a woman maybe I am blamed for everything worse happening in this world. Then I was crying that my tears dried and changed to white salty stuff. I wondered many times, why I have beaten to this extent? Is it in my luck? or really where is the problem? because I was the best student in my class, I was attending extra classes to learn foreign languages while teaching students, assisting my mom in house chores, and much more. I didn't find the courage to stand in front of my father to ask him why did I have to be beaten? additionally, I never had a boyfriend which is a taboo and prohibited in my culture. Gradually, it continued from 4-23 years old. As I worked hard in school, got a scholarship to study abroad, upon return my major concern is how to tolerate that domestic abuse again. My father is the same person. Two years ago when I was in Kabul during my summer break, I was sitting in front of the TV during Eid days which is a holy festival in my country slowly moving my body with my younger sister he entered inside the room started beating me so badly. Then he was searching for my passport to tear it. I didn't cry but struggled to find my passport and hide it from everyone. Finally, I could do that. Even till the last moment, he didn't talk to me. It is true he is my father, but I can never Love him. I respect him too much, but when I remember him I just scared of even breathing with him under one roof again. Life is difficult, stories are different but some may have worse than mine so I am glad and optimistic about life.