Zero Tolerance for All types of Harassment

Aysh Khan
Posted November 2, 2017 from Pakistan

I am going to write on a real life incident happened to me some weeks before. This incident made me realized two things. First sometimes your small efforts for someone else can bring big changes into their lives and can be a reason of feeling safe for them. Second the hearts of transgender people are more kind and loving as compare to other people.

I, Aysh Khan belong to a lower middle class family of Pakistan and I am doing job since 5 years. Before that I was studying in university for 4years. So for whole nine years, I am doing local travel and I have seen/faced many incidents of teasing girls on road which made me shattered and frustrated. Many happened with me also and maybe I don’t remember the detail of each incident. But sometimes I see other girls being harassed who are younger than me. Who don’t respond to their harassers and those men keep doing to other girls. The girls in my country are scared of speaking against harassment as it is a perception that it would be a reason of losing family honor. That’s why harassers become more confident.

But here I want to mention one thing, the day you respond back is the day when your win over him. The day I showed back of my shoe to a harasser and everybody encouraged me for the stand I took, was the last day of my fear. After that I became so strong that just my way of looking on a man makes him scared and he does not dare to do or say any bad thing to me.

Before that incident, when a man intentionally pass his bike near me with zigzag strange turn which can hurt my legs or I may fell down, I always start screaming with fear of accident and have made a joke of myself many times. But now, I don’t move from where I stand even after seeing him doing that zigzag and coming towards me. I start looking at him with full opened eyes and he changes his way as he gets that I am not that weak girl he was assuming and hurting me can be a reason of his own loss. You know, this is a psychology of all such men. They have deeply insecure personalities so they do such cheap acts to satisfy their ego. But when they encounter a strong woman, they find ways to escape.

So now let us come to the recentincident I have encountered. I was going back from office in the evening. A rickshaw stopped by me and I sat in it. Rickshaw driver was waiting for more passengers and then a transgender woman came and sat with me. She sat making some distance from me as they have a mindset that we do not like them and maybe I ask her to sit away. I noticed this thing but said nothing. Then some boys came near the rickshaw and start asking her to go with them in return of 500 rupees (5 US$). They were making joke of her in public and asking for sexbut nobody was stopping them, nobody was even noticing that what is happening. It was like a routine thing. She was so uncomfortable and replied; get out from here you rascals. How dare you to ask me such thing? You know what, I can sell boys like you in 500 rupees. I have my honor too. Her reply did not make any difference to the boys and they kept doing same question. I kept watching all this and was feeling so devastated. I could not decide that moment how to stop them as there were hundreds of people on road and no one was doing anything and I was travelling alone. So I thought that if I will do something, they may harm me also.

But then worst thing happened and I couldn't control myself.They sat at the back seat of same rickshaw and started touching her inappropriately. Suddenly I lost my patience and screamed at driver. I said him that you are so insensitive. The boys are doing such cheap act in publicand you are silent. I am telling you to warn them right now as if they said one more thing to her or touched her, I will gather all the people here and say that they are harassing me and I will call 15 helpline and will make them arrest. I will make their lives hell. Just tell them the Pakistani law against harassment. According to which they can be in jail for next 3 years or will pay a fine of 500,000 rupees (5000 US$) or both. Suddenly there was a complete silence in rickshaw and driver asked them not to do anything again.

I asked her to sit comfortably and she can sit near me, I don’t mind. I said her to raise voice for such incidents as such men are coward inside. After 5 minutes of that, all boys asked driver to stop rickshaw and left. Although before they were saying that they are going at the same place where she said to go, but then they realized that their effort can be a big loss for them.

After they left we both kept talking to each other and I encouraged her to be strong. Her voice was with full of tears and she said that I don’t know my mistake, I don’t know why people like me treated like this and it’s OK for whole world. I tried to calm her and said not to worry. God is watching and will punish all who hurt innocents but you also have to be strong and replied them as bad as they treat you.

Then her station came and she asked driver to stop rickshaw. While she was paying her fare, she also paid for me. I asked her not to do so but she replied with love, you are just like sister to me. Then I did not stop her, she was so kind. I felt so happy inside that I made her feel so good and safe. I thanked to God for giving me courage on the right time. I felt so proud and happy for that moment. This was our first and may be last meeting.

But With this incident, I learnt that never underestimate the power of a little good act. You have no idea what big difference it can make for someone’s life. Just keep paying the rent of living on earth by such human acts and give your hand for help wherever and whenever you can.

Lastly, I want all parentsto educate their children and make them understand that transgender people also have self respect. You can’t buy them and you just can’t humiliate them because they are different. It’s not their fault that they are born not like us. It’s a God’s decision and you do a big sin while you insult HIS creature. Realize it, change your way of thinking and take stand for such people whenever and wherever you see others are doing any bad thing to them. You should not take it normal, it’s not.

This post was submitted in response to Share Your Story On Any Topic.

Comments 11

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jlanghus
Nov 02, 2017
Nov 02, 2017

Hi there, Aysh:-) What a great story. You're so brave for standing up to all those boys and confronting the driver. I would not call that a small act, but a big one. What a great gesture you did for her. She probably thinks about it often how there is goodness in the world. And, I agree about parents being more tolerant of their children's gender, and paving the way for a new future of more tolerance. Thanks so much for sharing your act of bravery. I, for one, am very impressed:-)

Aysh Khan
Nov 03, 2017
Nov 03, 2017

Thank you dear Jill for reading and appreciating.

I just want everyone to be tolerant towards differences of others and do not abuse a person for any reason. Be it any gender, we should be caring and loving. Thats all. It does not take much effort to be polite. second if we see any bad thing, we should come forward and help.  Both things don't cost money or anything.

With Love,

jlanghus
Nov 03, 2017
Nov 03, 2017

You're welcome:) Yes, that would be ideal. I agree. I think it takes just as much effort to be polite as it does rude. It's just a choice. And, whenever we are rude/mean to someone else, it always comes back to us in some way, shape or form. We can't be mean to others and it not affect us negatively. I agree, if we see something unsavory, we should intervene, but most people don't, usually out of fear of what others think or maybe fear for their own safety, perhaps. It always seems like people, in general, are impressed by hero stories of someone stepping in, but when you see something in front of you actually happening, it's hard to say if someone/anyone would step up and do the right thing or not. It comes down to integrity, then. Even seeing a homeless person on the street, for instance, do you help each one of them, help some of them, or do you walk on by?

Aysh Khan
Nov 06, 2017
Nov 06, 2017

I do agree with every word you have written. yes we can't help all but as much as we can. we should. Its just the difference of thinking.

jlanghus
Nov 06, 2017
Nov 06, 2017

:-) Have a great day:-)

Yusra Shaukat
Nov 02, 2017
Nov 02, 2017

Often people are hesitant to talk about these kinds of topic, but you nailed it out. Transgender are also human being like us and I believe they are far better than many of us. Looking forward to listen more from your side:)

Aysh Khan
Nov 03, 2017
Nov 03, 2017

Yes Sarah, You are right that people are hesitant to talk about this topic. They are hesitant to stop harassers even. The most disturbing thing was that everybody was ignoring this act. If this happens to a girl so openly, nobody would be so senseless, then why for transgender woman?

We all have to work towards this to change the thinking of our new generation and train them to treat everybody as a human.

Thank you for reading.

With Love,

Featured Story Teller, Vocal Contributor and Encourager at World Pulse

Yusra Shaukat
Nov 03, 2017
Nov 03, 2017

My Pleasure dear:)

mae me
Nov 03, 2017
Nov 03, 2017

That is one thing that we need to do now a days, to speak up! and not ignoring things especially if we know it is wrong. Sometimes acting right in the midst of wrong brings justice. Thank you for speaking up Aysh, it’s about time!!!

Aysh Khan
Nov 06, 2017
Nov 06, 2017

Dear Mae Ann,

I can't tell you how embarrass I was when they were touching her. Something very uncontrollable came out of me and i just did this thing. One thing I could not do and I wish to do is giving them hard punches on face. They are shame to humanity. I wish we all can live in peace.

Thank you for reading

Featured Story Teller, Vocal Contributor and Encourager at World Pulse

mae me
Nov 06, 2017
Nov 06, 2017

How I wish too.... to live in a peaceful community

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