Parents of children with disabilities also need support from the society.

belinda mayar
Posted January 10, 2022 from Cameroon

It's very common to see friends, neighbors and the community showing empathy and recognizing the challenges and plights children with disabilities go through. Sometimes, people will make a lot of sacrifices to reach out to this child, to encourage and motivate the child to understand that disability is not the end of the road, and let them know that more can be achieved even with a disability. Why all the effort?

The reasons are observe, when a child has a disability, the child will experience personal, social, economical, psychological and emotional challenges, it could be not having a place within the family circle, little or interaction in school or in the community, having feelings of growing up to be a liability because of no job opportunities, inaccessibility issues, the reality of not having a suitable mate when it's time for marriage. These are some of torn that hunt every child with disability as they grow aspiring to be better in the future. Infact every child with disability has experienced one or two of those challenges no matter whether you are poor or rich, black or white,in Africa or in Europe. 

Sadly, parents are never seen experiencing those challenges but will always be encouraged to be a support system for the child with a disability. But then, do you know that when a disability is born, it's the parents who first become traumatized, who is rejected,who is marginalized, isolated, blamed and cursed? They start asking themselves what they did wrong, the family members start questioning them, the community start rejecting and isolating from them and the society denials inclusion for them, yes that's what parents go through. Infact,a mother will experience twice as more of these challenges than the child with disability until death. Yes, that's what these beloved parents of children with disabilities go through. 

So, do you think they need encouragement too? Do they need psycho-Social Support? Do they need capacity building? Do they deserve a support system too? Yes,yes and yes, they need it, they will need encouragement not to give up no matter the situation, they will need psycho-Social Support to bring a balance in their mental health, they need training about disability, how to support and accommodate disability and will be motivated to know that they can count on other parents, individuals and different organizations for support. 

Therefore, let's recognize the fact that, breaking of barriers and actions for inclusion shouldn't start with the children with disabilities but rather with the parents and if that is attained, it will be easier for the parents to transfer and transform the lives of their children with disabilities. But if not, what many  homes experience today with children with disabilities is as the results of these gaps.

So, if we want to see a society of supportive, confident, inclusive and smart children with disabilities,let's begin with the parents.

Comments 7

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Tamarack Verrall
Jan 11
Jan 11

Dear Belinda,
Such an important call to action. Locally and globally we have been steered to pay attention only to ourselves. What I love about World Pulse is that we can collectively work together to shift this to working with and for the whole community. Your call for us all to pay attention to the extra burdens and discrimination that parents who have children with disabilities face, and to make real support a community priority, is such an important call for real action and change.

Queen Sheba D Cisse
Jan 13
Jan 13

Greetings Belinda,
nice to meet you here and read your say about this very important topic.
We would love to say education is so very important. Without education we would be in the same category that millions believe we are under a taboo curse of fate. I am grateful to have worked and still do with many people with learning and developing challenges as I would like to call it.
Keep up the good advocacy for yourself and others and keep inspiring because we need this support especially in the African villages where many are forgotten about.
sincerely,
Mama Queen

Beth Lacey
Jan 13
Jan 13

I agree with you. The parents have so much to struggle with when a child is disabled. They definitely need help

rebecca.tang
Jan 16
Jan 16

Thank you for sharing and pointing out. It is not easy to raise a child and even have more challenges to raise a disabled child. The parents indeed need more support on psychological, financial, social, etc. support. You are right that they need the training about disability and how to support the child. There are a lot to do to achieve the inclusion and diversity.
Hope the Governments, NGOs, and everyone can do more to improve the situation!
May Almighty God bless you and all disabled child & their parents!

karenvillard
Jan 17
Jan 17

Hello Belinda, you tackled smart points that needs to be heard. I love that you are talking about inclusivity not just for the directly involved but those people around them that is also impacted by it. As a parent, this has been our fear twice when we were going through pregnancy and had asked for a gene testing to see what lies ahead. We knew we cannot be prepared for but we know that we couldn't give up on our pregnancy no matter what. Knowing, not knowing.. are both a nightmare so knowing ahead is what we have chosen to do. We are the lucky ones but as our children grow, we still wonder. Being a parent is hard work, the hardest we have ever experienced. They are even harder than our careers or business itself. To raise another being, to make sure that they'll be okay. It definitely raises anxiety and guilt during parenthood. I cannot imagine what parents who have disability are going through and I know that they have good hearts and only wants best for their children. But you are right, it is not always sunshine and sunflowers. They need help, too. From family and friends, someone to take over and look for their child to have a break, From services, a compassionate care that helps parents in terms of physical, emotional, and mental support. What I found really helpful in different aspects is community. I would recommend that a community be build to support these parents online or in their local neighborhood. There should be some fun events that promote inclusivity that all parents and children can enjoy.

In another life, I worked in media advertising and one of my clients is an FMCG whose factory only employed people with disabilities. Like 100%. And not just for show in their feature magazine or corporate websites. I think if there is light for employment for their children in the future, parents will also have that peace of mind that their children will be taken care of even though they cannot be there for them.

Catherine Djiemo
Jan 22
Jan 22

Hej queen B,
Am over joyed to read this piece. This call is so vital. Many times there is isolation and exclusion of parent in our local communities. It could be as simple as an invitation for a cultural play to just a girls time with friends. Its a physical and mental struggle for parent especially in a society were disabilities is most often viewed as inability.
Thanks again and may this be hidde by CSO working on inclusiins as an intervention for physical and mental health. Warm hugs
Mvh
Catherine Djiemo

Grace Iliya
yesterday
yesterday

Dear belinda,
This message is very important. I totally agree with you, the parents need support as well. The whole community should rally round to give attention to all. Thank you for this wake up call.

Much Love