The important lesson I had as a girl child.

Dikarabo Phakane
Posted June 14, 2020 from South Africa

When I look back at my younger me,when I look back at the decisions I made,i look down at myself and I regret.I started to be in love at the age of 15 doing grade10 because i thought it was a good thing to do as everyone was doing,and before I could say "I love you too" to the proposing guy I would ask my friend,and guess what she said "why not my friend" I thought I was not gonna love him at first,until I could hear a classmate talking about him,I thought I was not gonna have sex with him until I heard a classmate of mine saying "If you do not do it,he will leave you and we will take him".This has gone through my mind and December 2016 I decided that I will approach him myself n tell him I am ready because I was so in love with him.April 2017 I received a message on Facebook from a girl telling me she is pregnant with the very same guy I'm in love with,it brought a lot of pain to me.I slimmed because he was not only a boyfriend to me,I had no other friends except for him,I told the guy that I I will support him,n remember I'm still 17years.You know what happened?the guy told me that for me to be with him I have to respect his baby mama n not always call him.I was so in pain,and always crying to God to heal me.But I today say I do not regret everything,I am so proud of me because I dealt with the pain alone or with God and it did not change me into being a bad person.It was a lesson to me n my life,and I'm so glad I came across such because I'm wiser today than I was yersteday.I know I'm still young in age but I have grown in my mind.To my lovely sisters out there if you have been hurt, know that it's not the end of the world.Remember every person has or had an important role in your life, good people give you memories and bad people give you lessons.

This story was submitted in response to Supporting Our Girls.

Comments 8

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Jill Langhus
Jun 15
Jun 15

Hello Dikarabo,

Thanks for sharing your vulnerable story, dear. I'm glad you overcame this sad tale and emerged stronger. I hope you have learned to not fall for thinking you have to do something again? That boy was playing you and the other girl, too. It's makes me sad, and angry, that boys think they can, and do, get away with this sort of behavior. I'm glad that you shared this story so that others can also learn to not settle for less than they deserve. We are worthy of love and respect. Always.

Dikarabo Phakane
Jun 27
Jun 27

Thanks a lot and yes we are worthy of love and respect

Jill Langhus
Jun 29
Jun 29

You're very welcome, dear. XX

Thelma obani 2020
Jun 15
Jun 15

We are here for u dear.
Thanks for sharing , you are loved.
Stay strong

Dikarabo Phakane
Jun 27
Jun 27

Thank you my darling ♥️

Chi8629
Jun 17
Jun 17

Hello Beautiful Sister ,
Thank you for sharing .
You are loved dearly .
Please stay safe and warm.

Dikarabo Phakane
Jun 27
Jun 27

Thank you love ♥️♥️

Hello, Dikarabo,

Thank you for sharing your story.
A heartbreak is truly painful, dear. I know you loved him, but you deserve a faithful man. May that pain of betrayal be your guide in choosing a future partner (if you want to get married). A lot of young girls can relate with you, especially in this generation. I'm glad you have overcome that part of your life and have grown wiser.

Here's a song for you, dear: https://youtu.be/YPaU7jJvqRc