tuesday motivation

esther atosha
Posted February 5, 2019 from Democratic Republic of the Congo

Life is not summed up by filling the earth with individuals. Each life means a star and each star has the role of enlightening. Two weeks before I had a little discussion with my niece. I ask her the question of what she projected in 4 years. She replied that she is in her fourth year of secondary school and after high school she will finf herself  an husband who will take her as a wife. I ask her to know if she will not fo futher with education ; she categorically refuses and tells me less that she does not find a taker (husband). I continue asking her, what are her dreams? she tells me that she is dreaming of a husband who loves her and who will call her her wife in the eyes of many. I insist with the same question she reaffirms me that she has no other dreams apart from having a husband,  found a family, and  raise her children.

A week later when I was going to mama shujaa center center where I did the English teaching benevolence to the women of the center. I meet a girl in the middle of the road and she asks for 200 Congolese francs to pay for the transport. before giving her I ask her the questions of who she was, she tells me that her name is Jeanne. After her 4th year of high school, a man came to her presenting herself as a husband, he married her. after their second birth, her husband beat her, returned home late, and drunkenness. One day the husband came with knives wanting to kill her, she runned with her 4 children.

I ask her the same question I asked my niece to know how she plans her life in 3 years. She said that she has already learned a good lesson with  men and she is now very cautious with men. I replicate, "Here is a woman who speaks." She continues, replying that she is now looking for another husband who is very different from her previous husband. guys  I was like '' what the hell? ''I took my breath and I did the coaching role.

Worldwide,  Africa and Asia in particular; 3/5 of the girls summarize their dream in marriage. religious and traditional beliefs use the Scriptures of the Holy Bible to keep the woman as an animal. I have a little message for you women of the world: dear women,they  will only attach us to the price at which we display ourselves. men can not give us a great place in society if we do not value ourselves. Let's change our mentality, dream big, transpose our limits into bridges to our dreams. Before thinking of marriage, think of some places where people die because of hunger, think of those suffering women of the world. Let's change the world. Our star must light up the world. I am not against marriage, far from it. marriage is not a drain of responsibility or a resolution to the problems of women, we can take care ourselves. Marriage is an addition of an associate to our dreams a; partner who comes to supplement us.

Comments 12

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Aurora-Transformation

Nice post. I think you are right. We women should depend only on ourselves.

esther atosha
Feb 08
Feb 08

Hi aurora,
Yes we have to!
Thank you for your comment.

jlanghus
Feb 05
Feb 05

Hi Esther,

Agreed. We don't need men, but when we are ready and when we want to, we can look for a partner who appreciates and respects us mutually as we do them. I hope your niece thinks more about her future and dreams now.

Hope you are safe and well!?

esther atosha
Feb 08
Feb 08

Hi Jlangus,
Am doing the best showing her how best she IS without her d├ępends on others!
Yes , i am ! Hope you too!

jlanghus
Feb 09
Feb 09

Good job.

Glad to hear it! Yes, thanks!

otahelp
Feb 06
Feb 06

Esther you are completely right. Most girls in our African region do not have a life or think of a life beyond getting married and having children. They do not learn from the experiences of others. they learn it first hand by being directly involved. some do not believe that they could have a different life beyond that man or the other. i thank you for sharing your work please do not give up with the continuous education of our young girls and women.

esther atosha
Feb 08
Feb 08

Hi otahelp,
Thank you for your comment.
We must stop being held by our emotionnal feelings .not every men who says ''i love you '' loves us for Real .
A all way up , nothing can stop me dear!

Ngala Nadege
Feb 06
Feb 06

Hello Esther
You are so right.

esther atosha
Feb 08
Feb 08

Hi ngala,
Oh thank you !

Beth Lacey
Feb 12
Feb 12

Great advice!

esther atosha
Mar 12
Mar 12

Hi Beth,
Thank you !

esther atosha
Mar 12
Mar 12

Hi Beth,
Thank you !