Men and Menstruation don’t go hand in hand in our Indian culture. Females are not allowed to discuss this phenomenon candidly with any male. There are men who are exceptionally uncomfortable talking about this subject and have absolutely no opinion on this natural biological process. They believe having less knowledge of the process is the key issue. How can they even become acquainted with the theory without even interacting with females and hearing their experiences? Mere bookish facts won’t serve the purpose. We humans are made of emotions and love and not by computer chips and all sorts of machinery.
I am blessed with an elder sister so my mother was least bothered about my first encounter with periods and the first public shame a stain could bring. She knew I was prepared due to my sister’s over hyped instructions and training.
But I was enlightened about Periods and Menstruation process by my Father the correct way. In fact, to my surprise, I still and will always remember the moment I got my first period. My father was the one who rushed to a nearby chemist and got me a sanitary pad. He dint make me feel ignored or untouchable. He came and handed over the pad straight to me in my hand. I am so glad for that moment for just occurring in my life. That was the ice-breaking session between me and my father and I became most period-friendly with him afterwards (until now!)
My father used to work in a Sanitary napkin manufacturing company and knew the in-depth theory of the pad to be used along with its thickness concerning the blood flow. He taught me everything in detail and without any shame. He even insisted me to worship the supernatural power and almost made me normal during my menstrual days. He said, the more you stop, the more your periods will overpower and dominate you.
Just one difference it made in my life. We (me, my sister, and my father) indulge in a lot of humorous physical fights that often end up breaking someone’s head. During mine or my sister’s period days, the first thing we would do is inform our father not to fight with us for five days as our physical weakness would make us lose the game, to which he would tease us by replying that we anyway never had a chance to win against him. I guess that time we loved this failure of ours. We can always let our father win as he was actually a hero to us every time.
But it doesn’t end there! He would keep us pampered all the time making tea for us, preparing a hot water bottle without even asking for it and taking leave from his work, and sitting by our side. His presence in the home lessened mine and my sister’s pain. His aura reflects such positive energy and heals us automatically. There has not been even an inch of embarrassment for us to discuss anything with him related to menstruation. His way of understanding and feeling our pain makes us cuddle with him more during our periods when other girls find it difficult to even talk to their fathers regarding their own menstruation process.
I am so glad that HE is my father because of the friendship and togetherness he belongs along with him. He is an awesome listener and I wish all the fathers could support their daughters like this by being with her in her most fragile menstruation days when we are fighting with all the emotional and physical challenges.
Once I almost died of pain during my menstruation leaving my father helpless. He suggested going for a movie to which I shouted that why chromosome X and why not Y papa?
He laughed and said I am glad it was X. I am glad it was a daughter. I jumped out of the bed and said, “Ok! Which movie we should watch?” Such little incidents make us less fearful for our periods and more warmth for him.
My friends envied this. They craved for the same relation to which I feel ‘The chosen ones’ for me and my sister. What’s more! We even have a code word for the term ‘Periods’ at home by which we can discuss this anytime and in front of anyone leaving the other people perplexed.
I believe, the young fathers whose daughters have not reached the stage of puberty should equip themselves with all the obligatory information linked with Menstruation and they should be the ones to disclose this major occurrence in the life of their daughters. This would create a magical bond which only you and your daughter could embrace.
Men should initiate this and grow to be powerful fathers and save their daughters to witness any ignorance from society. For daughters like us; our society, beliefs, values, faiths, almost everything is dependent on the early and timely teachings of our parents, especially fathers. They look up to him as the first important male in her life. Don’t make her regret her decision. Support her, support her EVEN during menstruation.