A WOMAN WITH COURAGE, PASSION AND STAMINA: ARAMIDE- WOMAN LEADER OF THE MONTH

Elizabeth Aramide Oikelome is a vibrant woman leader from Nigeria; a journalist, media mentor and consultant with over twenty years experience garnered from both private and mainstream media. She founded Bestspring Children & Youth Development Foundation. World Pulse Leadership is pleased to feature her as the Woman Leader of the Month of June. She has a story, experience worth sharing and impacting. It’s one story of a leader that will compel you to believe in yourself as a leader but also to energize you the reader to rise up and move on to pursue your dream.

Growing upAramide's childhood was challenging and schooling a very tough experience. Like most mothers would always want the best for their children, her mother encouraged her to endure hardship and focus on education for a better future. Her family suffered severely as a result of financial lack and neglect. \"At some point my mother had to pack out and was separated from my father because her life was being threatened. There were many days of hunger, sickness, nightmares, depression and pain but these trials and sorrow strengthened our bond and commitment to support one another in the family\" she says. Soon this was over and indeed shortly after she got admission into the University to study English Language, her immediate younger brother also got admitted to study business Accounting. Unfortunately, her mother could not afford to keep both of them in the higher institution at the same time, so he had to step down for Aramide to continue. Such was the harsh condition under which she and her three siblings were raised. It was through dogged faith, hard work, courage and prayer; they sailed through school and settled down to work.

Career and Leadership Trajectory

Aramide's interest in journalism dates back to her university years at the Lagos State University where she studied English Language for her Bachelors degree and later at the University of Lagos where she bagged a Master’s Degree in Literature. This kindled in her the desire and passion to write and thus igniting her pursuit for a creative writing career. It is her upbringing and environment that largely facilitated her to become a leader from a tender age and at home. Raised by a single mother (after she left her marriage), she always saw her mother show acts of selfless love and kindness. \"In fact, my mother was a reckless giver who would rather bring smiles to the indigent in the community than live or feed big on her hard earned meager resources\" she describes her mother. Life principles taught by her mother also played a major role in molding her character. Values of contentment, hard work, honesty, responsibility and selfless love were instilled in her. She was always told 'A good name is better than silver and gold and better is little with the fear of God than great riches and troubles'.

As a teenager, Aramide was always a preferred choice for leadership positions by her peers. She was always seen as a dependable friend to confide in, to receive counsel and direction. They looked up to her as a leader and coach. irrespective of age, tribe and status, many today still see her as a shoulder to lean on for support and strength in time of need.

Her little secret to progress is hidden in her perpetual quest for knowledge and learning new skills with the purpose of improving herself. Participating in various international activities has given her exposure and revolutionized her career focus, knowledge and performance. This has earned her promotions and today, she is a respected authority in her circles and community. She is proud to be reckoned with key achievements. She is a two-time recipient of the scholarship for the annual training workshop of the Oxford Center for Religion & Public Life, held in Washington DC (2007 and 2008). There, she was featured as Nigerian delegate and presented papers on sundry national issues. In 2008 and 2009, Aramide was a scholarship recipient for the Religion News writers’ Association to participate in their 59th and 60th Annual Conference respectively. In 2010, she became the first president of Association for Christian Correspondents in Lagos, Nigeria. \"My leadership experience with this group remains a bitter taste with sore memories. Oftentimes, my good intentions and actions to move the association forward were rebuffed and misconstrued; there was flagrant disobedience and at some point rebellion\" Aramide recalls. This confirms that leadership is not always a smooth path but how one is able to deal with obstacles makes a leader stand out.

She is also the 2012 global Fellow who benefitted from an intensive Coaching and Leadership Mentoring training at The Poynter Institute of Journalism in Tampa, Florida (in partnership with The Media Project). This knowledge and experience has enabled her train many Interns and Fresh horns in the newsroom, who have over time become very brilliant, apt and seasoned reporters. Currently she runs a quarterly mentorship program for young and aspiring journalists named 'Fresh Journalists Network'.

Leading Bestspring Foundation to change lives

Aramide founded Bestspring Children & Youth Development Foundation in 2002; a non-governmental organization in Lagos, Nigeria providing educational, nutritional and psycho-social support to orphans, vulnerable children and youth. Her leadership experience with the like-minded partners and volunteers in the Foundation has been exciting and inspiring in changing lives. However, she assures that leadership comes with challenges that need to be dealt with for one to progress. \"It is not easy to be a trail blazer and pave the way for others to follow but with hindsight, courage and determination, I have been able to pull through and surmount every challenge as it comes. Some of my partners/volunteers have had to resign because they could not flow with my leadership. However, as a leader I still maintain cordial and social relationship with them\" Aramide warns.

Bestspring Foundation is empowering indigent and physically challenged children and youth through educational scholarship and mentorship. Some of the beneficiaries have been transformed to A-grade students. They also run an economic empowerment program for indigent women, mostly widows who are trained in basic skills to earn a living (tye & dye, make-up, local fruit juice). The Girls Arise Initiative is now operating in Ijegun, Ikotun in Alimoso Local Government Area of Lagos State. A densely populated community, enmeshed in poverty and illiteracy, with high teenage pregnancy and school drop outs rates, risky sexual behaviors, unemployment, human trafficking and wanton waste of human resources and talents. The Girls Arise Initiative mentors girls and is geared towards safeguarding the girl-children against abuse and gives them a voice and platform to rise above the limitation imposed on them by their community and encourage them to aspire and achieve the seemingly impossible. This initiative is also providing a strong and safe platform for computer literacy and digital empowerment to the computer illiterate girls. Aramide says the girls too are very excited and expectant.

Leadership as a woman is about resilience, courage and commitment.

Being a woman leader in a patriarchal society can be a daunting task, especially if one is a woman of purpose who knows her worth. Aramide has had a lot of struggles in the bid to strike a balance between keeping the home front intact and pursuing her passion as a career woman and social worker. She remarks \"Whenever I get to this crossroad, all I do is make necessary adjustments and move on, while at other times I compromise on some things at least for the sake of the family\". Aramide interestingly does not subscribe to a feminist approach; rather she believes in persistently doing what she knows is best for her and those she is called to serve, regardless of whether or not anyone approves of it or not. She believes that a leader must be brave, determined; and prove that you are unstoppable.

Her family, her stronghold.

Aramide's family is a strong pillar and supporter of every project she runs. She has had several moments of pain, tears, rejection and confusion but she kept at what she was doing and with time, her efforts began to yield fruits. She has realized remarkable success, especially in transformation of lives. Over the years, people have come to believe in Aramide and what she stands for. Many have come to accept her as a mentor, role model and leader.

A basket of a futureThe greatest life desire of Aramide is to positively touch and impact the lives of the hopeless women and girls, empower them spiritually, educationally, economically; with knowledge and skills to advance in life. This is what gives her utmost fulfillment and joy. Healing their hurts, restoring hope and empowering them to have star-status in their life choices is her utmost desire. She envisions Bestspring Foundation nurtured as an internationally appreciated voice to advocate and protect the rights of orphans and vulnerable children, girls and women in Nigeria. Building and equipping a community library remains her priority to facilitate children and youth study for academic excellence. She wants to establish a fully fledged Orphanage home (construction project is ongoing), a Vocational training center for indigent girls to learn basic skills and provide start-up capital for small scale businesses. Having a vibrant and well-funded Educational Scholarship Scheme for indigent/streetwise brilliant pupils is what she envisions. Establishing a Journalism clinic where fresh and upcoming journalists can take short-term practical courses/training that will better equip them to deliver is an idea she is pursuing. As a woman leader, counselor and mentor, Aramide wants to have a counseling center for ladies to share experiences and support one another in the face of the vast challenges women face in a male-dominated society. Establishing a shelter for younger couples to be mentored on various aspects of family life and its challenges is her plan; a home where those that are broken and battered can find healing and solace, where they can reinvent their relationship.

Advice for other women aspiring to become leaders.

Aramide gladly offers some candid advice to women across the world. She believes in herself and so advises fellow women to believe the same. She describes this using powerful and magical words, \"Being a woman doesn’t make you less human. The world is ugly and dull without you. You are the fragrance of your world. You are the matriarch; the mother-hen that should shelter those around her. In fact, you are a special breed on a peculiar mission. You are a powerhouse, well loaded with what it takes to make a difference in world. Don’t let anybody put you down, either by their words or actions. Nobody can stop you, only you can stop yourself\". Aramide also believes that there are a thousand and one things (some legitimate) that are calling for our attention and ready to derail us as women, so one must be focused and determined to pursue her set goals and assignment. Being flexible to learn from others pays off in the future because nobody knows it all, so be humble enough to learn from others. Other people’s success should not intimidate but lift you up.

As women, it's important to support fellow women. Aramide sadly notes that often times; women are their own worst enemies, and not the men. \"Women should not stand in the way of a fellow woman when she is rising to the top. She is your sister, watch her back. Be your sister’s keeper.” Lastly she says, “Go Ahead- Go girl! You can make it and you will. Those who have made it are not better than you. Don’t you ever give up on yourself! If you have failed, try and try again. The world is waiting to celebrate you!\"

www.bestspringfoundation.org

www.justforrubies.blogspot.com.ng