Time doesn't heal but it teaches you to live with the pain

I had a rough upbringing from my family members to my stepmom . I suffered a lot that my heart is full of hatred still today , I was called names , beaten to death, raped , mocked , chased out of my home, they said I am cursed I should also die like my mother. Have on one everyday people see me smile but what they don't know is I'm smiling through the pain . They said i wont pass but I made but failed to continue with my education studies because I can't afford . I'm sitting and crying everyday wishing to go to school and be myself because when I'm at school I know I'm fighting do my future no one will take that away from me but everyday Im reminded of the pains I went through I thought I was bearing them because I will make it but no it seems it wasn't worth it the only thing that keeps me going is novels because they give me hope that one day my story will have a happy ending but till when will I keep going , I have been too strong enough I have reached the limit I can't go on I feel like dying .... After everything I have been through there is no change it gets worse