she is a pig

lebescoa
Posted July 26, 2010 from United States

So I know I am probably boring some of you with the talk of women and sexuality and how it is a double edged sword and how we are judged harshly and blah blah blah. But I am going to post about it again! I was having a conversation with a male friend of mine (yes feminists do have male friends) when he began discussing a buddy's ex girlfriend and her sexual preferences. Apparently, the woman in question was a "pig". What made her a "pig" I asked him. Well this woman liked anal, and more specifically objects up her anus. Now while this is not my cup of tea, I have the philosophy of whatever gets people off gets people off (excluding rape, coercion, or actions influenced by drugs and alcohol) but I digress. My point is, as long as people are consenting adults, who am I to judge what works for them in the sack? But it seems I am kind of alone in this thought, as evident by the all too common "she is a pig" "she is a slut" "she is a whore" exct exct. Apparently, when women have sex, we have certain curriculum and standards to adhere to! I mean sex is not really about people enjoying themselves and possibly sharing a mental and emotional connection, oh no it is an assessment for women and we had better pass it or we get the dreaded "pig" label. I just do not get it. At what point does the woman cross the line into becoming a "sexual pig". The term pig in itself connotes dirtiness and filth to most people, so it is obvious that if a woman is labeled pig it is because she has done something that is not acceptable and is even down right unclean. So at what point and what sexual acts do women become pigs? Is it when we give or receive oral? participate in anal? Initiate sex and show enthusiasm for it? Decide not to fake an orgasm for the sake of actually achieving one? Is the LGBTQ community more or less piggish than heterosexuals? The list of questions goes on and on. Basically, I think the answer would change from person to the next. But the bottom line is, women have restrictions in the bedroom. There is stuff we should not be doing and if we do well people do not approve! Ummmm... I personally could not care less if people approve of my sexual habits. I mean really, bite me! I have said it again and again women can have sex and do not have to feel guilty about it! Calling a woman a pig is a way to de-humanize her (which makes it oh so easy to rape her), makes her feel guilty for having sex in the first place (abstinence only sex education 101) and judges her for what gets her off in the sack (eliminating any chance of her orgasm which is really what the patriarchy is after) and makes her second guess herself and look to others for their opinions (submissiveness and complete control is like drugs to the patriarchy) so my advice? Have sex however you want and tell people who judge you for it to kiss your ass!

Comments 4

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Monicah Nzule
Jul 27, 2010
Jul 27, 2010

Thanks for speaking out loudly about this issue many feel embarrassed to talk about it its a very important topic in our lives Keep it up

Monicah Wayua

lebescoa
Jul 28, 2010
Jul 28, 2010

thank you very much for your words of encouragement

Olutosin
Jul 29, 2010
Jul 29, 2010

I love your voice lebe, the embarrassment is not unconnected with stereotypical patriarchal culture related tradition we have been mandated to imbibe. With time I will learn to discuss this too. Welldone my friend

lebescoa
Jul 30, 2010
Jul 30, 2010

thanks i love that people appreciate my honesty and i hope that i help other woman be more honest!