My pain, my win!

Loveth Ego Dara-Ezeanowi
Posted February 11, 2020 from Nigeria

Having gone through depression as a child in my sister’s house, I wished to settle with a loving man who would give me a better hope for the future or possibly wipe my tears but I was wrong. Firstly, why would I think marriage was a solution? I thought so because that was the only thing my parents planted in my head, instead of education! At 14, they had started preparing me for marriage, reminding me that my elder sisters married early so it has become a norm! Well, they finally succeeded, and got me married to a total stranger at 19! This was possible because I was already becoming depressed at home, as admission to University was already challenging with no support from no one. 

At 23, I had gotten three children, despite the constant verbal and physical abuse. I was far from being happy, I was not fulfilled, I felt deprived, I just knew the only way I could regain my strength and get empowered was going back to school. So the journey began, I struggled my way to the University at all cost, rather than wait to study my dream course...Law, which will warrant me staying more at home, I opted for any other available course just to ensure i don’t stay at home any more! I got admission to study linguistics and my local language. Was I happy with the course... hell NO!

To be continued...

Comments 7

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Tarke Edith
Feb 11
Feb 11

Hello loverth
You took a bow step to go back to school after having three children. Good although it was not your choice of doing law.but just that step along have proven that is never too late to start again.
Thanks for sharing sister.

Jill Langhus
Feb 12
Feb 12

Hello Dear, Loveth,

Thanks for sharing part of your story. It still sounds like you harbor some unforgiveness for your parents? I hope you're able to give yourself the gift of forgiveness so that you can be free, dear, if this is the case. I hope your story has a happy ending, too:-)

Anita Shrestha
Feb 12
Feb 12

Dear Sis
you are doing great. You could join finishing this subject passed after. Because life is long so not to be hesistated. Your dream will be fulfilled one day. Please be happy to get this opportunity. Take it as opportunity and gradually go with full strength, and full energy.

Bijayi vaba (May you get win)

laison sylvie
Feb 13
Feb 13

That was a bold step you took to go back to school. Thanks for sharing and hope you get to study your dream course

Beth Lacey
Feb 13
Feb 13

Good for you- taking a big first step towards healing

Rahmana Karuna
Feb 13
Feb 13

Dearest Loveth,
i hope you do continue your story. are you happy to be away from home with your university admissions? if you want an interesting linguistic professor check out. linguistics may be more important than law, not in any way to downgrade your passion for law. oppressors change the meanings of words and symbols.
https://www.suppressedhistories.net/aboutmax.html
Max Dashu founded the Suppressed Histories Archives in 1970 to research and document women's history from an international perspective. She built a collection of 15,000 slides and 30,000 digital images, and has created 150 slideshows on female cultural heritages across human history. For titles and descriptions, see the online catalog. (Read evaluations of her dynamic presentations here; scroll down to see where Dashu has presented in the past.) Dashu's work bridges the gap between academia and grassroots education. It foregrounds indigenous women passed over by standard histories and highlights female spheres of power retained even in some patriarchal societies. Dashu is internationally known for her expertise on ancient female iconography in world archaeology; female spheres of power and matricultures; patriarchies and allied systems of domination; medicine women, female shamans, witches, and witch hunts. Her work is followed by over 165,000 people on Facebook and remains in the top 1% on Academia.edu.

Kabahenda
yesterday
yesterday

Hello Loverth,
You are a woman of great courage. Although you are not happy with the course you are taking, I am hopeful that with your determination and hard work, you will end where you want to be. Where there is a will , there is a way.

I wish you all the best and thank you for sharing your story.