A mother as Teeneger below 18!

Pregnant as a teenager?

It saddens me that I have to share this story, but I have decided to break the silence and speak it out. Life back then was tough, as a young girl who grew up with no mother but with a stepmother who at one point could not understand the pain I was going through. Struggling to survive due to the change of environment. Once lived in the City of Nairobi but due to such circumstances, I transferred to the village. Adapting to the changes was tough, but I had to anyway. I stupidly got caught up with adolescent life. Taking advice from my age mates, I can blame myself for that yes. In my second year in high school (form 2). Stupidly broke my virginity with a stranger who I didn't even know with the aim that at the end of the day I will get some pocket money to survive in a boarding school. No one provided for me that so I may say I would have fallen into that trap anyway. Little did I know what was awaiting me. After some time, I started feeling strange and everything seemed different. My skin started becoming litter. my moods were changing, frequently had headaches. Anyway, I was used to chronic headaches so to me that was not a big deal. But this time was different, more different than ever, too bad...I missed my periods...Oh my...what do I do? Still had no idea what was wrong with me. Of course, I couldn't guess I was pregnant and that wouldn't even cross my mind. But the saddest thing was...It was true. I was pregnant. The very first time that happened? was hard to believe for sure. Darkness filled my heart, fear was all over. Who and where would I run to? The boy responsible was nowhere to be seen, from the sources, wasn't even a Kenyan but a Tanzanian who happened to go run away after hearing my pregnancy, 

It was tough, to make it worse, I have been chased away from school because I could not pay school fees, and now I am pregnant. My dad was very disappointed but he has to accept anyway, I decided to keep the baby. The school accepted me ( boarding school) and I was given a chance to continue with my studies. No one told me about going to clinics, not even my stepmother. I struggled with the pregnancy until 7 months. One evening, after we had closed schools for the August holiday, I was taken to an herbalist which was to give me a drug that will \"keep my baby healthy\" without knowing I took the bitter herb. That day I could not sleep at night. lying on my grandmother's house on the floor, I started bleeding and was rushed to the hospital. Yes, the baby was on its way. I went through normal labor, but sadly, the baby could not breathe. Was dead already! ( Stillbirth we call it)  I never got to see the baby's face, but she was female, I was not myself. I was young to understand (maybe) or maybe it was hidden away from me. My dad took it and buried it at home, I only got to stand on the baby's grave which was beside my late mother's grave.  I asked questions, but no one told me. And that's how I lost the baby and was forgotten.  I am currently 25 and God blessed me with another beautiful baby girl. She is so adorable and I really love her.  I had a lot of questions, what happened, why did I have to lose the baby? who caused it? but I never got the courage to bring back the memories because it was so heartbreaking. It's not okay to get pregnant at a young age, but it's also not okay to take away a baby's life. Maybe they had good intentions for me, or maybe not. But I am glad I can finally open up. Given a chance, I would like to have an initiative advocate teenage pregnancy and how it can be avoided, how it can be handled when it happens, to create a safe space for young mothers, and to make them understand that they still have a chance. I may not be successful in life, but I have come a long way and can probably impact someone's life.