Candies turned me Red

Mahrukh Pasha
Posted December 22, 2013 from Pakistan
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Life has many phases and one of its most beautiful phases is puberty. But for some it leaves unforgettable marks in memories. Yes, it was the day when I reach puberty. Like most of the girls I was also unaware of what puberty is and why my body is changing. It was the day when I had my periods for the first time. As of the conservative climate of our homes, nobody talks to their daughters about this natural phenomenon known as “Menses”. I was in my school when I heard the bell and finally it was that time of the day when everyone was going home. Joys, cheers and gaming zone full of children playing like newly freed slaves. I was down, and feeling exhausted. All I wanted to do was to get home as soon as possible. It was around a 15 minutes’ walk to my home from my school. Before I start my journey to home I decided to use the washroom. When I went inside I was shocked to see all of my Shalwar( Eastern Pant) was colored with dark red color and I had no idea why did it happen. At first I thought it’s maybe the red ink I had in my bag, split all over my Shalwar. I quickly started washing it with the Muslim shower in the toilet. I was afraid that my mom will scold me for ruining my new school uniform. But then I saw blood going down to my legs and I had no idea what was happening. I thought maybe I’m hurt or it’s maybe I ate those cheap candies which reacted. I felt so helpless and started washing my legs over and over again. After half an hour when I got tired of washing myself, I decided to go home as soon as possible. It was the month of December, quiet cold and windy. I took off my sweater and put it around my back and knot its arm on my waist. That was the only way I could hide it from people. I took my Shawl and put it all around me, especially legs and started walking towards home slowly and carefully. All that time I was praying that nobody sees me. I wished to become invisible until I reach home.

I finally reached home and ran straight to the washroom. I again washed my shalwar and legs again and again. I was scared to tell it to my mom because I thought it is due to the cheap candies I ate. I didn’t eat anything that day and kept going to the washroom after every 10 minutes. My elder sister who is 7 years elder than me, noticed that something is wrong, She came to me and asked me what is the problem? I gathered the courage and told her on one condition that she won’t tell it to mother. She agreed and I told her that I have been eating those cheap candies and they reacted badly in my body and I’m bleeding. She didn’t ask anything else and asked me to turn around. After seeing the blood on my shalwar she immediately took me to her room and gave me underpants and ladies napkin. She then called my mother from the kitchen and told her about my periods. I was scared and my sister didn’t tell me a thing. After all the tragedy of the day and me being so alone and using washroom again and again until my legs hurt. I finally found a little peace; my mother hugged me and then told me that it’s a natural thing which will come to me every month from now on. It’s nothing to worry about but it’s the sign of getting young. She just told me this and not a single thing more than that. I had questions, a lot of them inside my head that what was it? Why is it happening? Does it happen to my friends as well? Does it mean I’m getting old? Etc

The saddest part is that I stayed unaware until my late teens. I finally came to know about it when I learnt how to use computer and search for things. I googled it and came to know about all the scientific information. My point by telling my story was not to share my misery but to make parents especially mothers think that why do they hide it from their daughters? One day or the other it will come to them. Why not making them aware about their own body and the physical changes they will experience in near future. Most of the young girls in my country are still unaware. The mothers think that it’s really shameful to talk about it to their daughters. In reality the situation their daughters face publicly are more embarrassing.

The other problems attached to it are girls know very less about their reproductive system. Mostly because of the lack of awareness girls get into trouble. Pregnancy, catching STD’S and worst cases AIDS are some of the examples. The reproductive health awareness is very important. Young girls should get aware by their mothers and even in schools about menses. Girls who reach to puberty should must be aware of safe sex and self protection. It might seem to some people that I’m talking about something which is forbidden in our religion. “The premarital sex” but the ugly truth is that most of the people are involved in it. We cannot chain humans. It’s their body and their choices but we can aware them of how to save themselves and safe the future generation. Talking about sex always fascinates people but when it comes to awareness it always gets opposition of being getting too bold. Let’s end it all and let it be a world where we can easily talk to our children and talk on their problems associated to the physical and psychological health. After all we are the most blessed creatures of the world “The Humans”.

Comments 2

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No Name
Dec 22, 2013
Dec 22, 2013

Thank you for sharing. Such a shame no one prepared you for when you started your period. I love the strength in your voice. May it help other young girls who may be soon find themselves in the same situation. May it give others strength as well.



Dec 26, 2013
Dec 26, 2013

I totally agree with Nechesa that this is a beautiful piece. Menstruation is a hardly discussed issue in public spheres; and I am also very much aware that in my part of the world, mothers rarely prepare the minds of their daughters about puberty. Everything about menstruation is treated with unusual secrecy . You did well by being very open about your experience and I love the way you highlighted the associated problems that results when girls are not prepared well ahead.

Your passionate voice beams hope for change. Keep sharing!