Pakistan: Dowry is not a gift its a burden

The society in which live is very modernised today , the people are educated and feudal customs are changing. But the people thinking is not changing as it should be. The women are still victims of domestic violence.

The women in South East Asia are still a prey of dowry. The parents are compelled to give dowry to their daughters and a lots of marriages did not work due to this. If it is a gift from parents to their daughters than it should be a custom but today in our society it has become a business. The parents of boy demand house and car and many other luxury items and parents of the girl which are always in the need of an educated and employed boy have to meet up to their demands .

As the demands are fulfilled the new demand is ready to knock the door again and parents to save the marriage of their daughter fill it again and in the end the parents are not in position to fulfill demand and the result is the divorce. Even women are killed and are beaten for not bringing good clothes and household items in dowry. Women are quip even and get divorced also.

The boys parents exploit the girls parents. The law is there but implementation is not there to give women their rights. I have seen many women get divorced due to this. The story of my neighbour which i cant forget, the wife was daily beaten by her husband because of not bringing quality dowry and when some body went to save the women , her husband used to abuse her and always said its our personal matter and woman was not allowed to contact her parents even. When ever she come to our home and other neighbour home , used to call her parents. Parents always said that you have to compromise. She compromised and the day came when her husband became the father of a daughter and his behaviour changed with her. She took a breath of relief and was happy with her husband now. She forgot all the pain through which she went.

But who is responsible for the pain through which she went? The society? Parents? Husband? Woman? A few days ago a city of Pakistan witnessed an unprovoked death of a 25 years old woman by forced acid consumption. As per police reports her in laws forced her to swallow acid solely due to the reason she failed to bring a sizeable dowry in her marriage. I was stunned by this news and this kind of act is invincible . It is a socially endorsed form of violence.

The society has to change its norms to empower women. The role of law implementation institutions is key. Only laws are not enough but the practical is mandatory. Don’t try to put women behind the bars ,make her a free bird so that she can fly to see and explore the world .