MY CHOICE MY MISTAKE

Mariatu Lawan
Posted August 14, 2017 from Cameroon

why should women be the one to experience all forms of violence at home in the public and private places we should be given the opportunities regardless of our mistake.

i was 19 years old when I got married is the desire of every girl of my age to have a husband especially when we are in a community were respect and honour is given to those who are married.

Before our wedding he promise that married can never hinder me from going back to school , few months later in his house I became pregnant and gave birth to a baby boy my son became the source of my happiness when he was a year old I propose to take him to my mother so that I can continue my education but I was told that the promise he made to me was just for me to accept his proposal and when my son is at school age he will be taking away from me and sent to foumbot , how will I live somewhere and my son is elsewhere we stated quarreling and I was beating without any mercy I took my child and ranto my parent place where my mother decided that I will not go to that house she said a man who beat a woman is an animal and my child will live with me and the Almighty will help us through.

Three months I got the informationthat he has remarried but I still love him despite the situation one day he called me that i should came back home I told him that for me to came back my mother most accept.

He came to our house pleading, mymother forgive him saying that he will be a father to my son and not my husband.

One faithful Thursday he came and ask for permission to take the child out I accept but later it was almost night and he was no where to be found Icalled and called but his phone was switch off I got a call from him saying that if I want to ever see my child I most obey his instructions I had no choice as every member of the family blamed me for being stupid and foolish i was fell with painsi enter the house took20,000frs which I was sarving went to a bus station and headed for Douala I reach about 9pm I went straight to the house because my husband had built a house there but they where gone my husband and his new wife together with my son, fortunately I saw his brother who told me that they have left for Yaounde i cry but there was no one to help, that night I went to dutch were I could fine late night buses i went straight to Yaoundé to hisfriend's place i reach at 3am the cool was undesirable i had nothing as food except tears for my son I was at van when his friend took me to his house he bought me food but I had no appetite he finally called my husband he response and ask his friend to tellme to came to bertoua i followed him ,I reach at 6pm to where i saw my husband, his wife and my son we all leftfor tchadwhere we spent the holiday and cameback I was still having misunderstandingalmost every day and one day he divorce me and seiz my child i had to go back to the same family I abandon

My mother enrolled me in an evening school where I had my advance level I now work with an NGO in theimplementation ofthe sustainable development goal but in future I will like to creat my NGO whichwill help the young divorce girls but for now am just sensitizing them not to give up in life.

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Comments 9

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Nakinti
Aug 15, 2017
Aug 15, 2017

Dear Miriatu,

I felt so sad hearing your sad story. A lot has happened in your life -- from marrying early, to divorcing, to your child being taken away from you. A lot has really happened but the good thing is that you picked up the broken pieces of your life and went back to school. How nice!

Remain positive. Remain blessed. Keep your dreams high, there is light at the end of the tunnel. Work towards your goal and you will get there.

Sending you love from Bamenda, to you in Kumba!

Nakinti

Mariatu Lawan
Aug 15, 2017
Aug 15, 2017

Madam Nakitti thanks for taking your time to read my story through this I know that someone is touch

susan waweru
Aug 15, 2017
Aug 15, 2017

Dear Miriatu,

Your story is so touching Miriatu but the best part of it is that you moved, you picked up the broken peaces and went back to school which was your dream.

I would urge you to continue with the same spirit because there is always the Almighty God who does not leave us behind.

Peace be with you all the way from kenya 

Regards

Susan waweru

Mariatu Lawan
Aug 15, 2017
Aug 15, 2017

Thanks suzzy for reading my story and encouragement me as women we have numerous challenges and a strong woman is the one who can manage crisis

Sally maforchi Mboumien
Aug 15, 2017
Aug 15, 2017

Hello Mariatu

Congratulations for sharing your story with the aim to inspire and empower other women/girls. I wish to tell you that making the decision to move on with your life is the best victory you got out of the situation many will stay in such relationships and die young.

Concerning your dreams keep them close to your heart and you will be amazed at what you will become. Remember every woman has a challenge but strong women turn theirs into opportunities.

Mariatu Lawan
Aug 16, 2017
Aug 16, 2017

Hello madaliens thanks for taking your time to read my story you were one of the people who inspire me to share my story thanks again

WomenAndAfricaInternational
Aug 17, 2017
Aug 17, 2017

Dear Mariatu

I'm very sorry to hear your story. I'm very sorry that this has happened to you. Is it possible you contact the police station and report that your son is missing? Don't give up on your son. I think if you keep bugging his family, he will come around with your son. This is not fair. I'm sorry but be encouraged. Much love! 

Mariatu Lawan
Aug 17, 2017
Aug 17, 2017

Hi sister Jessica thanks to the word of advice I will appreciate if my son is brought home there are millions of women in the same situation at that time i had no one to help me we live in a community were they have the believe that if two people separate they should not fight on the child the only thing that i could remember of my son is him saying mama bye

WomenAndAfricaInternational
Aug 22, 2017
Aug 22, 2017

Dear Sis Mariatu

Don't give up on yourself and yourself. My prayer is that you may reunite with your son very soon. If you can, keep in touch with your son's family (the father's side). Sending love and blessings your way. Cheers!