It is ok to want more

Posted July 12, 2020 from New Zealand

The world made you believe you couldn’t do it, couldn’t handle the emotions, the realities, but you are way stronger than you give yourself credit for.

It takes a fluffing herculean effort to hide your trauma, your sadness, your deep bitterness, and resentment, to cover up the sadness, the gaping black hole that you are staring into… so why not use THAT power, THAT innate and pent up power, to smash the warped reality that the world has created for you to live in?

Now, I know you don’t actually WANT to break free, it is safe in the bubble, and this bubble was lovingly crafted to provide FOR you, you think you can’t survive outside of the bubble, just like the boy in the bubble or the elephant tied by a tiny string, you have been shaped by your experiences. You have grown to appreciate, to need, to love the very structure that is holding you back. Darling, you have Stockholm syndrome.

But I also know you no longer have a choice, that bubble, that safety net, it’s not working anymore is it? You feel ‘ off’’ somehow like you are living in a dream. But you shrug it off and carry on, right? I mean you have a family to care for, responsibilities, there is no time for feeling sorry for yourself. Chin up, ole girl. Keep calm and carry on. And for goodness sake, be polite, remember your role, care for others. The world depends on you, we all have our cross to bear, and if the little one rolls over we fall out the damn bed.

You. Are. Being. Controlled.

And it is time to take back your power.

I also know that you have lucid moments where you realize that this shiz is gonna drown you, you are not sure just how you got here or how to get out. I know that when you come up for air, in those rare as hell moments when you finally get 5 minutes to think, you look around you in wonder at the world that you yourself have shaped, and wonder if you are just being silly. Come on ole girl, you are just tired, have a coffee, soldier on.

Today, I invite you NOT to have a coffee, not to fold the washing, not to cook the dinner, but think about what it is that YOU are here to do in the world.

What would spark your passion?

What would thrill the damn pants off you?

What do YOU really want?

Women tell me all the time two opposing things (and yes both are present at the same time)

They are afraid to be too busy in business, they are afraid of creating the success that they dream of, because god forbid, what would they do if it really did take off? (and note, they don’t actually really believe it will — because they know they cannot let THAT happen). I mean they are the pillar of their family, the leader that everyone depends on. And here is the kicker, we didn’t really love ourselves until we became NEEDED, our kids changed our lives, we had someone that loved us unconditionally and needed us, like really needed us. And it changed our whole world, we are forever and eternally grateful that our kids saved our lives, that they showed us how to love ourselves. And THAT is why we feel so guilty about wanting more.

They are afraid to sit still and do no-thing. That is right, they are also scared to death of being STILL because that is when the soul starts screaming at them. So instead of taking the business actions that their soul knows they should be taking, they opt out on their dreams and instead be of service to others, I mean, it is much safer that way right? You get to look busy and be busy, and even be the martyr, but you don’t have to take accountability.

There, I said it,

the taboo thing,

the thing you are not supposed to say,


Being a mum is not ENOUGH.

I want to change the world.

I want to have time to change my own life, as well as take care of my family,

I want love,

I want all the money, all the clients, all the results,

I want to be the fluffing QUEEN of my kingdom,

I want space,

I want to be me,

I want to valued for the inherent value of being me, not for what I can provide.

I know you think these things too, at least when you have a moment to breathe.

And that is why you simply won’t give yourself a moment to breathe,

cause this shiz scares the pants off you,

and rightly so,

imagine if we all started taking responsibility for ourselves and our own happiness???

Well, it is happening, we are moving into a new era, and whether you are ready to acknowledge it or not, you are a part of the revolution, you are… YES YOU! are responsible for showing your daughters and your sons, that there is a better way to live.

A way to live in alignment,

a way to save the world,

a way to be insanely happy, and that actually that is the whole damn point, be happy, just do you, be real, the real raw warts and all you to find true happiness and acceptance and love, and oh yeah, that high vibe, kickass version of you, just happens to be what the world needs to REPAIR itself.

Yup, I said it, the world will repair itself.

You can carry on breathing sand, dying a bit each day,

or you can


and make a difference.

I hear your fears, I feel them, I have them too. I get push back, every day, and I get the fear, every day. But we cannot stay the same, the time for change is now.

You are everything to everyone. You can handle it sure, you were a corporate woman who made it in a man’s world. You tucked your baby under your arm and stated a biz from the ground up, you secretly get off on being supper woman (nee super needed).

But its time to stop being a pussy, its time to stop hiding, its time to step out of the bubble that has constrained (ahem, kept you safe) and live IN purpose, and fluffing out loud.

Stop taming your message, stop hiding your real desires, stop conforming, and stop perpetuating the spread of oppression that is wrapped around women to keep them ‘safe’!

Don’t deny its existence, didn’t you just teach your daughter that making friends is important? and that sacrifices must be made? Didn’t you just say yes you would make your famous chocolate devil cake instead of buying a cake from the supermarket even though your balls are to the wall in your biz, and you haven’t done a blog or a video or made a sales call in a week? The truth is that you REALLY want to do those things, they are burning into your brain, waking you up at night, but the kids come first right? Your family is the most important one!

Well, I call BULLSHIT! Who the hell made up that rule? And why do we buy into the bullshit that it has to be either or? Is it more important to make the damn cake and look like you fit into societies expectations or show your daughter that what you (and what she) wants is MORE important than fitting in?

Your true happiness lies in fulfilling your soul’s purpose. Men know this, they ride or die on the weekends, pull long hours at work to finish important projects, and you darling (despite sitting on a gold mine of a business idea) are running around at home ensuring he has enough to eat and planning a romantic getaway for the two of you. I mean his 9–5 is vital right! Despite the fact that you could make 6 times more than him if you just focused.

So just stop,


with the excuses.

Stop pretending you don’t matter, stop pretending you will get to it later, but that right now your family must come first.

You can roar like a lioness, you can break free and you ARE stronger than you think.

And the best bit, the world will keep turning and your family will do even better than before.

But you forgot what you would really want right? Sure you set up the business and it is plodding along, but how do you get it to roar alongside you?

Well, you gotta get real, find the real you, truly align your business to what is in your soul.

But you have stopped listening, you don’t know how to recognize the truth anymore even when it slaps you around the face.

When you DO get the real alignment, THAT is when you get all the money, all the clients, all the love, all the fun.

Follow that BLISS and watch the world soar.

Together, we shall rise,


Comments 13

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Jill Langhus
Jul 13
Jul 13

Hi Michelle,

Welcome to World Pulse! Wow! Thanks for sharing your powerful post. A lot of what you say resonates for me, however, I don't have a family, but I still feel the same fear of being too powerful, and at the same time wondering if I'm powerful enough. I'm not sure how many men follow their purpose, though. I think a lot of them are tied up in how much money they're making and going through the motions, just like a lot of women seem to be. I think empowerment for both women and men is important now.

Are you a life coach? Do you have a website? I'm looking forward to hearing more about your work, and what your goals are.

I hope you and your family are safe and well.

Hi Jill, that you so much for the message. Yes the fear is there with or without family, family tends to amplify it all (and hence is why a lot of healing occurs then). Do you have some fur babies instead? I have many of those!

Some men live in their purpose for sure, but not all, they have a lot of stories holding them back too. But it is women I here to serve, I am literally obsessed with empowering women, it is my sole aim on this planet - and yes I am a coach :). My website is if you want to grab some free resources.

Jill Langhus
Jul 15
Jul 15

Hi there,

You're welcome! I did have a fur baby but she died in January and my hubby and I are still heartbroken:-(

Yes, on men. I hear you about purpose. I can relate to that:-)

Thanks for sharing your website. I will check it out!

Hope you have a great, rest of the week.

Oh I am so sorry about your fur baby, your poor heart. Thinking of you xxx

Jill Langhus
Jul 17
Jul 17

Thanks! I appreciate it! She came all the way from SoCal with us to Spain. She was so unique. We know she will come back to us, but we're not sure when and in the interim we miss her:-(

Hello, Michelle,

Welcome to World Pulse! What a joy that a new voice from New Zealand is rising up!

Thank you for this motivating piece! A lot of it resonates with me, too, especially I have a son with special needs plus a toddler.

Please keep on writing! We want to know more about you.

Welcome again to our growing sisterhood!

Thank you so much, well I can't stop writing lol, so that won't be a problem :)

You're welcome. Sounds like a plan! Looking forward to reading your future posts!

Beth Lacey
Jul 14
Jul 14

This is such great advice that we all need to hear

thank you Beth, it makes my day to reaching and inspiring women globally

Anita Shrestha
Jul 15
Jul 15

Thank you for sharing

you are welcome :)

Paulina Nayra
Jul 20
Jul 20

Dear Michelle,
Whew! That was powerful - the self-talk, the affirmations, the mantra and the voices inside. Every woman should read this. And say I want more. I am strong . I am capable and will soar high.

Thank you so much Michelle.