As I sit here today, knowing that in the next 18 months you will be preparing to enter the university and also live your own way, I am scared to let you out of our safety net called family cum home; yet I am grateful I still have 18 months to share moments that will count later in your life journey.
So today, I want to share few nuggets that have helped me along the way and I hope it will help you when the need arises:
1) Acknowledge the girl you are and the woman you are becoming, by taking everyday as a gift and enjoying the relationships and situations you find yourself in.
2) I am the 1st child of my family and so are you. So much is expected of you and that is okay, for this is the best place to learn leadership skills and the ability to navigate relationships during tough times. Please daughter do not forget to let your younger ones see the real YOU. It is okay to let them know that you struggle also, for they will love and support you always.
3) Forgive Dad and I, for giving you much more than you can bear. YOU are our 1st child and we have never been parents before. But one thing you can be sure of, is that we love YOU deeply and we are willing to relearn, unlearn and learn till you become the best version of yourself.
4) Find YOU! If there's nothing you will take away from this letter daughter take away this - "FIND YOU AT ALL COST!".
Many people will disagree with the YOU that you are becoming, sometimes even family might disagree. But if you stick with YOU, loving others but never compromising; things will come around. But if you compromise 'YOU' for people; your life will be filled with imitations of others and great unhappiness.
I found 'ME' a bit late (married and in my 30's) but I have never been apologetic about it, for my voice is found in the authenticity of me and that is my prayer for you darling.
5) Trust God; He's no longer popular, but He always comes through when everyone deserts YOU. Oh yes! Trust your inner gut, it usually won't lead you wrong because it is a compass set to guide you by the Creator.
Finally, learn from my mistakes; please don't inherit them.
I love you daughter and I love your brothers too.
Fly high Kamsy, fly higher!!! Let your voice count!
Mom - Ngee (Ngozi Okonkwo) Founder - Keeping Marriage Alive initiative. www.keepingmarriagealive.com