I speak out to heal

Nnenna Hannah okoh-Metu
Posted April 5, 2018 from Nigeria

Outraged to speak,

Outraged by fear,

Sinking me beneath,

I arise out of it,

To speak and be free.

 

I cant say exactly when it happenned, the month is still vivid but the day and time have suddenly erased in my mind.

I dared that day even memories have refused to fade.its exactly 13 years now,in the  month of febuary,in the city of enugu in nigeria,i was then a polytehnic student,i remember we where ask to leave the school premises because we were through with our 2 years diploma programme,i beg and ask to stay but was told to leave immidiately to allow other student in the school hostel,i carried my bag,losts and in thought ,thinking of where to go from there.

It was a little past 7pm on that febuary night, as i sink in thought,thinking what and where to go next.

Feeling a little tired,i sat on the in ogui road aear,i had very little money on me,and nowhere to go.

After a little while a young man aproached me,he sounded very nice at first,and ask me what and why i sat there that night,i innocently narracted to him,and he offered to help out telling me he had a sister that could sleep in her house.

I was naive at that time,i didnt know i was getting myself into arms way,so along the way to his supposely sister house,he stopped two other men and whispered something to them, before i knew it,i was violenty carried away,an handkerchief was placed on my nose,i lost conciousness.

I woke up naked and all briuse,feeling lost i was left by my captive a days later,by then i have been raped massively and abused.

I got my things together and cried my eyes out,as i left the building i meet a woman who told me that she heard screams.

She carried me in,cared for me and gave me money to join my family back in lagos.

I am among the lucky few because i didnt get pregnant and catch a terrible disease,i couldnt tell anyone this part of me for years.

I keep this away because i felt ashamed and the society i leave in will blame me for this rape.

Rape is the most unreported case in Nigeria, the raped is blamed so she seek solumn in herself,i have carried this pain for 13 years.

I speak out to break the silience , eventually i will heal.

Comments 5

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Jill Langhus
Apr 05, 2018
Apr 05, 2018

Oh, Nnenna honey... I'm SOOO sorry to hear about your rape. I do hope that you have forgiven yourself for anything you feel you may have done regarding this horrible incident? That is always the first step to healing. I'm glad you finally felt comfortable and safe enough to share with us. Have you considered submitting your story for the current story awards, "You Are a Silence Breaker?" This is the link, if you are interested:
https://www.worldpulse.com/en/voices-rising/story-awards/83055. Please feel free to share more and let us know how we can help you...

Nnenna Hannah okoh-Metu
Apr 05, 2018
Apr 05, 2018

Thank you sister, i am still healing,its still difficult,i will heal eventually,thank your for reaching out

Jill Langhus
Apr 05, 2018
Apr 05, 2018

You're very welcome. Let me know if you need additional support, encouragement. I'm there for you...

Olutosin
Apr 05, 2018
Apr 05, 2018

I Love you more my sister. It's not your fault, you are healed. The rapists will suffer Amen
I'm always a shout away...... I agree with Jilll. You are a silence breaker Princess.

Nnenna Hannah okoh-Metu
Apr 05, 2018
Apr 05, 2018

Thank you sister tosin,it took mountains for me to write,i believe this is the start of my healing process