mama and papa, you made me

pelamutunzi
Posted April 15, 2013 from Zimbabwe

everyone was startled and stood up we all ran into the hall mama!mama! he screamed you made me into what i am!

mama you let me beat my sisters to show i was a man but now i know it is just cowardice i beat up my wife last week and she left she did not understand that beating her up made me a better man. i tried to explain using your words but she did not understand.

mama i also did not cry when she left but mama why does it hurt is it not you who said boys don't cry mama i beat her up just to show my manliness just the way papa used to beat you i thought she would just keep quiet like you used to do

papa! was i wrong following your footsteps you always used to say we should beat up the women to keep them in line but papa she said i was a fool to beat up a woman but papa you said that it was what men did tell me papa what i did wrong for i followed your exact footsteps.

papa you said women are property that we own to do with as we please but papa she has left i treated her like junk and thought that would make her love me more like mama used to do to you instead she left me papa. i humiliated her and called her names but she left mama. mama look at your deformed body from years of beating. but why are you still here mama i hear sister tsitsi is in the same dilemma as you she is married to a monster like me and papa why then does she not come back mama

you know mama you could have gone to school too mama but papa wouldn't let you i remember when i found you crying after the harvest we had no clothes, you had no clothes but the harvest had been good you quickly wiped your tears and said it was okay papa had drank the money away in town with harlots but you put on your mask and said women do not question their men's behaviour but when i did it with my salary my wife was furious, why mama? i remember sister mercy could not go to school that year father drank away the harvest money yet you smiled when he came back with a second wife why mama? mama you worked the fields alone and could have made it on your own but no you said you could not go back to your people you didn't want to become the laughing stock but mama he beat you up that night and you refused to go to the police mama because you didn't want him arrested. mama look at your tired face that bears the mark of years of abuse but mama my wife has left mama did i miss the lesson you and papa were sharing.

mama you made me but i am sorry i am going to go against your teachings and beg my wife for mercy never again shall i beat her she shall become my partner not property and i shall love her i shall respect her mama. that is all mama i apologize but papa you were wrong and mama even though you were victim you were wrong too. now i know men of quality are not afraid of equality.

Comments 33

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Awotunde-Olubiyi Bisola
Apr 15, 2013
Apr 15, 2013

Men of quality aren't afraid of equality...you have said it all.beautiful write up. No more violence against women,we've had enough! Thank you...more!

pelamutunzi
Apr 15, 2013
Apr 15, 2013

thank you.enough is enough lets stand up and stop violence.lets teach our children to value all human life and they will follow it for the rest of their lives

loretta
Apr 15, 2013
Apr 15, 2013

I honestly mean that, am speechless. True, some women out there live this kind of life.

I am grateful that I was brought up by strong women and proud that I come from a very strong lineage of women. They were only eluded by strong educational background, two of them, whom I even doubt ever went to School, gave me a lesson I value and treasure in my heart; they walked away. Just like the wife and sadly one man never realised as "you" have and one did. It brings tears to my eyes to find men writing about this topic. Wonder of wonders, there is hope after all!

Pelamatunzi am so proud of you!

World Pulse keep beating.

pelamutunzi
Apr 15, 2013
Apr 15, 2013

yes it is about time things change it doesn't matter what anyone says or what you will do first leave your life is more important than status. we need to stand against abuse so that men who are born are aware that we don't tolerate nonsense. enjoyed writing the piece as I was thinking about my son and what kind of values im teaching him as his mother. we women are important inhow our children turn out thank you for sharing the story of the women in your life its encouraging p/s im a woman

loretta
Apr 15, 2013
Apr 15, 2013

I really am sorry didn't mean to offend you. Matter of assigning certain names to men and women :)

That's true, we have to conscientice our sons, that being a man doesn't equal hitting a woman.

Keep well!

pelamutunzi
Apr 15, 2013
Apr 15, 2013

just was imspired by my growing son and how if we are not careful can instill the wrong values in him. also sometimes we blame men but the background is critical in forming a person lets try to change right from the roots as women lets strive to educate our children and make good decisions.p/s not offended was flattered it means I captured the feelings of the men well

loretta
Apr 16, 2013
Apr 16, 2013

Definitely you have captured the attention of men.

Keep at it!

Shahd Majeed
Apr 15, 2013
Apr 15, 2013

Family plays a vital rule. People's backgrounds affect their behavior so much. We as voices of future, we call every woman to raise better children !

Love

pelamutunzi
Apr 15, 2013
Apr 15, 2013

thank you and I support you. we do not like the system but we raise our children to be worse. sometimes its almost sadistic to me. your husband beats you and yet you encourage your son to do the same

Sangita Thapa
Apr 15, 2013
Apr 15, 2013

Dear pelamutunzi, a poet couldn't have written better than you have. Its so real, so moving. Thanks for posting!

pelamutunzi
Apr 15, 2013
Apr 15, 2013

the story represents my vision for the future where everyone takes responsibility and the circle of violence is broken

CynthiaM
Apr 15, 2013
Apr 15, 2013

This is a story that should be shared world wide. Apt, graphic and real; a wonderful peom indeed. I will definitely quote you..."men of quality are not afraid of eqality". Thank you.

Cynthia.

pelamutunzi
Apr 15, 2013
Apr 15, 2013

it is true these are some of the words our sons may not say but they definitely would want to. lets teach our children when they are young so that when they are older they will remember the good ways taught by their mother

Ogo Maduewesi
Apr 15, 2013
Apr 15, 2013

You nailed it, you said it all. .......... So trueeee, can see much of my mother here though I did not witness her beating physically, but abused verbally. I started fighting for my mother at a very tender age, when we will go without food, but She must keep food for him, he returns and kicks the food, waited for my mother to talk, but She never did until one day when I did, it changed things so much that I really wonder if that would've continued if she hadtaken the bold step to question. Glad she can ask questions, yes we are all grown and does not live with them, but he remembers the rebel of a daughter.

pelamutunzi
Apr 15, 2013
Apr 15, 2013

that's a powerful story thank you for standing up for your mother. can you believe that the exact experience has also happened where I see my uncle kicking food that my aunt has suffered to find and cook. now the next time I see I cant keep queit thanks to you

estelle achinko
Apr 15, 2013
Apr 15, 2013

so real...luv it

pelamutunzi
Apr 15, 2013
Apr 15, 2013

I appreciate thank you

Maya Norton
Apr 15, 2013
Apr 15, 2013

Oof, honestly I couldn't even read it past the first few stanzas because what you said cut straight to the heart. Powerful writing. Thank you for this, Pelamutunzi.

And Abinsinoula, "Men of quality aren't afraid of equality." Preach, indeed.

~ Maya

pelamutunzi
Apr 15, 2013
Apr 15, 2013

thank you. lets fight to end violence against women once and for all starting with teaching women

Maya Norton
Apr 16, 2013
Apr 16, 2013

Joining hands with you.

~ Maya

CynthiaM
Apr 15, 2013
Apr 15, 2013

This is a story that should be shared world wide. Apt, graphic and real; a wonderful peom indeed. I will definitely quote you..."men of quality are not afraid of eqality". Thank you.

Cynthia.

Maonah
Apr 15, 2013
Apr 15, 2013

I wish all men will recognize this the way Pelamuntunzi has. whose fault is it? who is the mother of the boy who became a man and a husband? is it not that same woman who is a mother, a wife, grandmother? - when you really look at issues of violence from men on women and girls , the root cause is the very woman. For Christ sake can our girls and boys be trained from childhood to recognize how to treat people as human beings and not you are a girl or a boy attitude? Pelamuntunzi - you are my guy and respect you for your courage to let mama know she was at fault even though she was the victim.

pelamutunzi
Apr 15, 2013
Apr 15, 2013

you are right we need a new kind of woman who nips violence and cruelty in the bud and raises worthy children. as a mother I need to speak out so my son is a son who respects women

libudsuroy
Apr 15, 2013
Apr 15, 2013

hi, pelamuntunzi, great work! about time you post this in your journal as instructed. lovely!

pelamutunzi
Apr 15, 2013
Apr 15, 2013

thank you

radiocami
Apr 15, 2013
Apr 15, 2013

Thank for joining the male voices trying to accomplish the same goals us women are here to see become realities. THanks for helping us open eyes and change the status quo!

camila

pelamutunzi
Apr 15, 2013
Apr 15, 2013

hello thanks for your comment. we must all stand together for change to happen.p/s im a woman

Minakshi Tripathy
Apr 15, 2013
Apr 15, 2013

Fantastic.Say no to abouse,no more we want to be like mama.we are we, have the rights to live with dignity. Regards, Minakshi

pelamutunzi
Apr 18, 2013
Apr 18, 2013

we are we. we must push forward and can never go backwards. we will live our own legacy.

lintajonhera
Apr 15, 2013
Apr 15, 2013

I am so glad that some one 'gets' it. While men are alone are often vilified for the abuse of women, women also have to acknowledge the part they play in condoning and perpetuating dysfunction.

That said, the key is that, 'Men of quality are not afraid of equality'. Our past need not be our future. Let's rise above it.

pelamutunzi
Apr 18, 2013
Apr 18, 2013

true what you say women need to take responsibilityand stop the circle of violence by refusing to turn a blind eye when another woman is abused. the abuse of one is the abuse of all sould be our motto

Woman of voice
Apr 16, 2013
Apr 16, 2013

I strongly think that as mothers and women in our growing society of todays youth, it is our responsibility to correct the wrong teachings of the past by not only speaking the truth of freedom but by also demonstating it.

pelamutunzi
Apr 18, 2013
Apr 18, 2013

we must break the circles of violence instead of maintaining the status quo