Menstruation, Not A Right To Sex.

Queen Glory
Posted November 6, 2018 from Cameroon

Going to my village and seeing almost all girls being mothers in their early teenage years is so sickening. I pity these girls who can't take care of themselves yet but already have babies to take care of. They are as young as thirteen to seventeen. Just like me, they experienced menstruation without even knowing what it is. It was during the summer holiday when I just finished primary school and was getting ready to go to secondary school. I just turned twelve. I complained of mild stomach ache which was not taken seriously by my aunt or uncle. Being the youngest, I was pampered and allowed to sleep during the day. I got up to realise the sheet was stained. I had heard about it in my last days in primary school but did not even understand what it was. I just knew I was now a big girl and could get pregnant. I was too shy to even tell my aunt. I had a senior cousin who was too hot tempered and so could not even bring myself to confide in her for fear of what she could do. So, I took it upon myself to handle my issue privately. I knew I was suppose to use pad but did not even know what pad looked like. I went into the toilet,wrapped up some toilet tissue and used it. When the toilet tissue was all used up, I resorted to using pieces of cloth, not caring where it came from. It lasted for three days. All these days, I separated myself from all normal activities. I could not eat properly, I stopped playing or even sitting with the rest of the family to watch television or discuss with others. In all these, no one noticed I was going through stress in handling the changes my body was experiencing. I developed itches in my vagina and went to a road side drug vendor and bought some medicin which he prescribed to me after I complained of the itches. I went to a boarding school and while there, I met some seniors who took out time to explain to me what menstruation was all about and helped me use the right sanitary pad when next I had my flow. Those big sisters explained to us that there was nothing shameful in menstruation or being a girl child. It really helped me a lot to love me as a girl and to encourage me to adapt to the changes I experienced without shame. There was this particular day that I soiled my dress in class and a classmate who was a boy walked up to me, told me my uniform was soiled and offered me his pullover to use and cover up before going to the dormitory. I felt abit embarrassed for being careless but I was not ashamed of being a girl child. Since I live in town and rarely go to the village, I was surprised with what I saw happening in the village when I went home. Many teenage girls were either pregnant or already having babies. Girls as young as thirteen. For most of them, their education came to a dead end. I discussed with some and tired finding out why they got pregnant at such tender ages. All had a similar problem. They did not know what menstruation was all about. Their mothers had never discussed it with them. So they listened to their peers and to men who misled them into believing that they were now matured women and sex was a vital ingredient in their lives. These men made them to believe they now had a right to have sex but abandoned them as soon as they got pregnant and are labelled bad children by the community. Sheepishly, they believed the lies and ended up being mothers while still being babies. Let us help our young girls in rural areas to stop believing the lies that have ruined so many girl children and jeopardize their futures and help them to understand that menstruation does not mean a right to sex.

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Jill Langhus
Nov 06, 2018
Nov 06, 2018

Hi Queen,

Welcome to World Pulse:-) Thanks for sharing your menstruation story. It's sad that boys and girls aren't receiving proper sex education their and ending up child moms. I agree that it would be helpful if their was more awareness around this topic but also support and education, rather than misleading rumors. There are quite a few World Pulse sisters dedicated to bringing more sex education and support to girls and women. You will definitely want to check out Sally's work, if you don't know her already, for start. This is her profile: https://www.worldpulse.com/en/community/users/masaliens

Also, you may want to consider submitting your story for the current story awards, "DayOfTheGirl." The link is here, if you are interested: https://www.worldpulse.com/en/voices-rising/story-awards/88828.

I'm looking forward to seeing more stories from you and finding out what your hopes and mission are.

Hope you have a great, safe day!

Queen Glory
Nov 06, 2018
Nov 06, 2018

Thanks for your comment. I'm grateful. I have submitted for the competition for "Day of the girl child". Thanks once more. Remain blest.

Jill Langhus
Nov 07, 2018
Nov 07, 2018

You're welcome, dear:-)

I don't see your story submission on the "DayOfTheGirl" story page, but I will let World Pulse know that you would like to have it considered and included in the submission pool.

Hope you have a great day, and good luck with your submission:-)

Queen Glory
Nov 07, 2018
Nov 07, 2018

Thank u. I tried submitting but with poor connectivity of internet here, I just could not. Please consider my story for submission. Thank you.

Jill Langhus
Nov 08, 2018
Nov 08, 2018

You're welcome. Yes, they will consider your story for submission. Good luck, dear!

Queen Glory
Jan 18
Jan 18

Hello, Wishing you a prosperous 2019. Its been hectic over here as we as film makers strive to do films under the very hustle conditions we live in. In currently in pre production for two short movies all centered on the African girl child. Killers creed talks about a man who leaves township and returned to his village after his wife and two children died. He claims it is as a result of witchcraft. His best friend gives his 15year old daughter against her wish to him as a wife. Later, we discovered that the witchcraft that killed his wife and children is HIV AIDS after he has infected this young girl of 15 with the virus. The second is BLEEDING SHAME. It talks of a girl who menstruating without even knowing what menstruation is all about. She goes via a lot of trauma because she has no body to confide in. What do you think of the stories?

Jill Langhus
Jan 18
Jan 18

Hello there:)

Happy New Year!! Oh, wow! That is busy.

Yes, those sound like great, and relevant topics to cover. Are they based on real stories or a combination of a whole bunch of real life stories.

Looking forward to hearing more about them.

otahelp
Feb 24
Feb 24

Queen you are completely right about our girls in rural areas needing more help. We all have to work on this. it is same in my village but the truth of the matter is that most of them are comfortable in this miserable life they have created for themselves unknowingly and is not ready to come out of it. But it should no deter us from offering our assistance whenever we can to empower them with knowledge and information. thank you for sharing

Bettina Amendi
Mar 16
Mar 16

Memories are treasures no one can steal.Queen,you guided me back somewhere.
Thank you for sharing.
Regards
Bettina

nceducator
Mar 23
Mar 23

Thank you for sharing your heartbreaking story. My heart goes out to all the girls in your country who will become young mothers, and who are not as fortunate as yourself in getting support and education. I myself began to menstruate at a very young age, 9 or 10, I think. I was horrified that something was terribly wrong. My compassionate father was home when i got home from school and gently and patiently explained what was happening. Later, in Girl Scouts, we were shown a film explaining the process. I'm impressed by the actions of the boy who helped you :-)

dana, u.s.