Girls are always victims

ReenaReena
Posted October 7, 2019 from Pakistan

I belong to a small village of Pakistan where Sister Zeph is working day and night to transform lives through education, awareness and skills.

I am on number two among three siblings. My elder sister I and our younger brother our father is a unique man in Pakistan because he did whatever he could to save life of my mother when she got cancer. He sold out our home for her treatment when all the money was spent because he loved her so much and wanted her to remain alive by all means. But she could not make it and died. We all left alone, our hearts were broken.

 We were living at our uncle’s home who after sometime asked us to leave so we left and shifted in a rented home in front of home of Sister Zeph.

This is a small narrow street, two people hardly can walk together here and in this small, narrow street Sister Zeph is opening ways for women to live empowered lives.

Soon we had  good terms with her family, She convinced me to pursue my education that I left in 9th standard after my mother got sick, but I always ignored it, then she asked me to learn stitching, I joined the stitching center, but it also felt like it was boring therefor I joined the beauty salon training center.

My elder Sister got a job in sister zeph’s center and things started going so well. I was happy with my life, but then my father got sick, he got so much worried for me because he thought if something bad will happen to him I will remain alone if will remain single because my brother and sister were already married

So he started looking for a match for me. Soon he found and within few months I got married.

I was happy to have own home and the love of my husband, but on the very first day I realized that that I was married to a wrong person, who was so proud and a strange person. He was a tailor and he wanted me to work with him so I would work at home all day, like a servant, I would wash cloths, dishes, would clean floors, would cook food three times a day, would help him in stitching and would serve him any time he wanted to.

After one month I realized I was pregnant. I thought now he will give me some time to rest in a day, but he asked me to stop talking to my family because it could kill my baby he said women should not talk to their family during pregnancy. But because I was pregnant my sister would call me because she was worried for my health. I was not allowed to have my own phone she would call on his cell, he started recording my calls. He would beat his sisters over small things and would call my family of lower class and people of less value. He would call my father with names over small things.

 My blood pressure would remain high. One day I was so sick only few days were remaining in my delivery when I had to wash cloths all day, I had nothing to eat and until evening I was collapsed. They called a local Dr from the village that is not qualified to be a dr. he gave me an injection and I got unconscious when blood started coming out of my mouth they had to bring me to hospital. Doctors did an examine and found out that the baby was died inside the womb, they had to do major surgery to take out the dead baby, but while they were doing the surgery I had a swear heart attack, they left my opened womb as it is and started to deal with my heart. My heart did not beat in natural way for four days. My family was told by doctors that I will not survive, my body was swollen, my heart was not beating, my womb was opened, my baby was died, blood was coming from my mouth, ears and nose and my husband was doing politics to prove himself a caring husband.

Sister Zeph and her whole team were praying with my family, everybody was crying for me.  My son was buried and I could not look at him even once, I have been feeling him in me for nine months, I made so many plans and saw so many dreams about him. He was part of me and I could not even touch him when he came into this world, his eyes were closed forever inside me because his father wanted to keep me in his control, because he thought if he would give me rest I would become lazy and would not look after the household well.

Luckily or unluckily I survived. It has been eight months since I am living at my parents’ home. I did not learn any good skill because I did not know what sister Zeph keep saying that really can happen to women after getting married therefor they should be empowered to face all the challenges that can happen to them in future.

He wants me to go back to his home, but he thinks he has not done anything wrong. During all these months he never came and cried with me over death of our son. He never came to ask me if I need anything, or how I am feeling, he never said he is missing me and he wants me to come back to him.

Today I have a job at sister zeph’s center I know I am not much qualified,but she gave me a job so that I do not die in loneliness, so that I can spend some time in doing something constructive.

I want to give a message to each and every girl on this girl’s day. ‘’ Do get education and focus on your career before getting married or you will not have a home''

 

This story was submitted in response to GirlForce: Unscripted and Unstoppable.

Comments 16

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maeann
Oct 07
Oct 07

Dear Reenareena,

Welcome to World Pulse.

Thank you for having a courage to share your story to us.

You are a strong woman. You are loved. God has better plans for you.

Good to know that you are in a good hand with Sister Zeph's center.

You still have chance to learn and educate yourself. Dream and be well.

Anita Shrestha
Oct 07
Oct 07

Dear Reena
Welcome to you in this WP. Really you are saying truth because every girls need to education and independent otherwise life is fall on very struggle. you shared your very sad and insightful story. Keep it continue of further story. Thank you very much.

Hannah B
Oct 08
Oct 08

Dear Reena,
Thank you for sharing your difficult story with us. You are not alone! I am so glad that you have some work and support with Sister Zeph. This must be an incredibly hard time for you, and I think you are very brave for sharing your story here. I hope you will find support and sisterhood in World Pulse.
Warm regards,
Hannah

Anum Shakeel
Oct 08
Oct 08

May Allah Subhan o Tala give you health and Sabar. Ameen. Very Sad to hear your loss.

Sabdio Roba
Oct 08
Oct 08

Dear ReenaReena,
welcome to world pulse. What a story, thank you for sharing it out and being so brave. You have greatness in you and ahead of you. God has amazing plans for you, do not give up, be patient and keep going. Is there a way you can restart your education? maybe study from home?
much love
Sabdio

Lisbeth
Oct 08
Oct 08

Hi Reena,
Thanks for sharing this your sad story with us. So sorry for your lost. Thanks also to sister Zeph for her great initiative. Through her at least you got hope
What do you plan next, move back with him or not? Will you continue to develop your skills at the Zeph education program?
You are greatly welcome and I hope you will find the consolation need to uplift you
My kind regards

Riachny
Oct 08
Oct 08

Dear Reena,
God, I cannot explain how do I feel when I read your story. You don't deserve this. No one deserves to go through something as terrible as this. I know that I'm not someone who goes through the same pain as you but I sympathize with what happening to you. You're such a strong woman. I really admired you. I cannot imagine something like that happening to such a strong and loveable person like you. Thank you for sharing this story for us and also for this educational advice.

Dawn Arteaga
Oct 08
Oct 08

Oh Reenareena, I am crying right alongside you. This is heartbreaking. You have a right to feel valued, appreciated, and cared for. I am holding your hand across the distance.

Tarke Edith
Oct 08
Oct 08

Hi Reenareena
Ooooh you are welcome to world pulse.l am very sorry and feel like crying for what you have gone through sister.
But thank God you are alive you will start again.
For it's never too late for a woman to start again.
You are a strong woman .
Stay focused now on your career . you will succeed.
Thanks for sharing this with us
Have a great day dear

Jensine Larsen
Oct 08
Oct 08

Reena,
You are so strong, and so brave. Look at what you have survived. Keep believing in yourself and your future. We love and celebrate you here on World Pulse. We mourn your loss with you. How you have been treated is wrong. You are a miracle and deserve the education and future you want. You are turning pain into power, though it can be a long process.

Ajnish Ghimire
Oct 10
Oct 10

Strong message to all women in the world, welcome to World Pulse Reena

Anne Dupont
Oct 10
Oct 10

Dear Reenareena,
Thank you for your courage in sharing your story with us. I am so sorry about the death of your son and grieve this loss with you. No one should have to go through what you did. I am glad you are working at Sister Zeph’s center. You deserve a better life and I am praying that you will find it. You are brave, strong and talented. I will keep you in my heart and prayers.
Warmly, Anne

Kanwal Javed
Oct 13
Oct 13

Mam Reena No doubt it was painful period for you...and even also until today because when sister Zeph had been reading the comments which the different Ladies have given about your story for encouraging you. then your tears also made me cried. and you should get studies for survive with your rights and dignity. may God heal all your wounds of life immediately.

Tola Makinde
Oct 13
Oct 13

Oh my dear Reenareena,

My heart aches. Sorry for all your losses. You are so courageous and strong. Being alive is a great testimony and im sure your pain will ease away gradually. Thank God for sis Zeph.
Remember you are loved and World Pulse is a wonderful place to be.
Feel at home and never give up.

Love
Tola

ANJ ANA
Oct 14
Oct 14

Dear Reena
Welcome to the world pulse. I can feel your pain, how hard the days you have suffered mentally and physically. But you are so brave that despite your hardship you start doing work with hope. You are so true that education is very important , . I hope you will continue your work and someday you will help other women in their need Keep your faith continue your effort for being strong my sister.
Thanks to sister Zeph for all her support.
sending you love and regards,
anjana

SHILPA KASHELKAR
Oct 15
Oct 15

Dear Reenareena
Salute to your courage and struggle....We all are with you.
With Love Shilpa

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