If She Had Known Better

When I was 10, my aunt who was living with my family at that time called me to the living roomsee 'something'. I had never seen such a thing before, it was a nakedwoman touching herself, it was a pornographic video. Ofcourse you wouldn't say she hated me, but I'm sure she wouldn't have done what she didif she had known better. We had series of adults who came to live with us while I was growing up, each of them with their different personalities. Thank God none of them abused me. But then their lifestyle gave me an idea of what being 'grown up' was about. I looked forward to being a grown up cos I understood I could drink, sneak out of the house and do what I watched on that video, and so I started to lie about my age. Thank God for the strict matron we had in my boarding school!I didn't dare to have sex because I was scared she'd find out I was no longer a virgin.

Having family around is a good thing, but not at the expense of your kids. If you read my last post you'd know by now that my mother and I didn't have the whole mother daughter bonding thing while I was growing up so I pretty much learned everything I know on the job(growing up) through trial and error. I learned to start covering my body when a concerned family friend saw me playing bare chested with already protruding breastsand she asked me if my mom didn't tell me. So I got the girl talk that day from a 'family friend'. Oh well. I don't hate my mom, don't get me wrong. I only wish she knew better.

Mothers shouldn't shy away from talking to their own children. If you're leaving your kids with sitters or care givers, know exactly what they're up to. I'm not saying you should be paranoid or distrustful, just careful. Talk to your kids! Talk! Whether it's an uncomfortable subject or not. Don't let your kids learn on their own. Even animals cater for their little ones for a while before leaving them to be on their own. Those precious little beings need all the time you can spare. If you brought them into this world, then they deserve your attention and care. They deserve to be listened to.I know you could be busy with work and all what not, but make them talk. Don't hush them up or assume what they say is unimportant. Just listen, be there.