I now have the courage to speak out..I lost a cousin sister of mine about 4 years ago, May her soul rest in peace..She was in a very abusive marriage. It all started when she thought at 28 she needed to get married. She gave herself unnecessary pressure to the extent of paying her own bride price to a man whom at the time seemed to have no clue at all about his future. It was too late for her as she already was pregnant and wanted to have a family but fate could not have it. Her body was that type of African woman (big ass), who had no the gift of dancing. So as the time went by, he became jealous of the way she danced at parties and work functions. Mind you-she was the one working and him a stay at home man-let's just say a hustler but in Shona we say magweja-gweja. He started beating her anytime he had a reason just to make sure those man he thought were attracted to his wife would know she was a marked territory. She sent pictures to my mother and I know my mom would tell her to stay away from that marriage but she feared how society would view her. The beatings became more nastier as time went by, she thought maybe it was because he felt threatened by her education so she decided to enroll him at a teacher's college but alas that is money which was wasted. He didn't attend the lectures was always drunk and smoking weed. When the beatings got worse and worse they divorced but the husband threatened her. She finally moved on but little did we know that all these beating had side effects later. She then succumbed to chest pains and died. The autopsy said it resulted from domestic violence. I know if I had a voice then we would have saved her life before she died. I used to blame myself but I realized that all I needed to have done was talk some sense into her. Today, #IStandWithHer to ensure no woman faces the same predicament as my cousin.
I call out to all my sisters who stay in relationships that are toxic, but due to societal implications they cannot get out. I call out to you today; to rise up and be who you ought to be…FREE from all forms of abuse. When you feel you cannot take it anymore, leave! Your happiness matters
That is why #IStandWithHer because I know she deserves better