Hey wonderful sisters,
I wanted to personally share a life lesson that I had to learn, once The most high released me from all my silent pains of broken wounds. I hope that this blog will encourage someone today who has gone through sexual, emotional, abuse of any sort and can recieve something from this.
As I speak out, I speak to the broken, the inner child within me and you, that desperately needed someone to let me know as I was growing up to my adult years that there is always light at the end of the tunnel and you will come out stronger although your eyes cannot see just yet.
I was once a victim, of abuse, in every form and I would never wish that on anybody because it can be very draining. I often question myself wondering why I wasn't so messed up and still remained a nice person regardless of my own scars. There are so many women out there who experience abuse on all levels who are to afraid to speak up. I truly believe they are afraid of being judged, ashamed feeling like they will not be taken seriously, because many people would rather not deal with the matter due to their own demons.
I remember their being a time where I felt like I couldn't speak out to my mother, afraid that she would not do anything or hear me out. So during my school days, I suffered in silence, asking God why has this happened to me.
A few years past, and I noticed that I was forming a invisible mask, hiding behind the makeup and clothes, desperately hoping that nobody would be able to read my pain. To make matters worse I kept attracting the same type of manipulative men into my life, because I was so broken. I so desperately wanted to be loved, but soon realised that I was seeking that from the wrong person. I didn't even love myself at that point so how could I expect that from somebody else? You ever heard that saying " You will attract who you are or where you are at"? well that was my cycle. I didn't know how to deal with all that pain so I buried it deep in my heart lying to myself that I am good.
After giving my life over to God, which felt like the last resort for me at the time, I started learning more about myself, understanding why things were the way they were, and what to do in order to be free because quite frankly I was tired!!!!
I realized, that I was constantly trying to heal myself in my own way with the wrong things, and I never quite came to terms with everything that happened. I convincing myself and others that I was totally fine when in reality, I was not fully stable emotionally.
To all you beautiful women and young girls who are suffering in silence, I encourage you to speak your truth and take back your power. No longer will you hold it in and suppress it, but express it!
Freedom does not come by being silent, but comes from being open, forgiving yourself understanding that what ever happened to you was not your fault. We must speak our truth to the so we can find some healing and also encourage others to come forward and express their pain. Ladies and young women, You are not your past but a new person of power, hope, confidence, able to do whatever you will to. These abusers may have thought they have won, but when you get out of that bed, out of that depression you soon realise that they have lost the battle!
It is time for us women to take our power back and uplift each other, as we all come from different walks and backgrounds.
Shine in the beauty and confidence that God, has given you and take back your control and be empowered as we are all queens. This means that each of us hold alot of value to the community and we can help stop the cycle for the next generation to come.
Stay blessed and remember that each one of you is loved and destined to be something great.
Thank you for reading..