MY DECISION

uduakedet
Posted March 10, 2019 from Nigeria

When women support each other, amazing things happen and that’s why I love to help, support and encourage other women. World pulse is an amazing platform. The positive energy is electric and I have been given several opportunities to meet and bond with women who have truly become my friends.

I believe that one woman’s success should in turn benefit another woman.  The workplace shouldn’t be any different. Occasionally characterized with competition and witch-hunting, women need to look out for younger female colleagues, to encourage and support them so that they can learn, grow and be positioned for greatness. The men do this, lifting each other up at the slightest opportunity and although some women are beginning to wake up to this reality, we need to see more of it in the workplace.

Over the years, I have met and transformed incredible women who had to lean on me for knowledge and support. My first meeting with them is usually at the point when they start work. I put them through the modalities of their job roles , train them until they can stand on their feet in the workplace. My relationship with these women does not stop at a professional level. I try to get to know their personal lives so that they become very comfortable to discuss their fears, anxieties and future aspirations with me. The guidance I provide makes them become better women, wives and of course, employees. Today, a number of them have very fulfilled lives and are doing well. I probably should add that no one pays me to do this. I just love doing it because it makes me happy. Lending weight to fact that if we must change the world, we need to start with the people around us.

Recently I met a young woman. When she resumed in the workplace, she was a greenhorn. Inexperienced and unsure of what was required of her at work.  I could have chose to treat her shabbily but I didn’t , I stuck to what I know best which was to treat her exactly the same way  I have always treated every young female employee. I was protective and supportive and eager for her to learn and grow into a better person. However, I faced the greatest shock last week when I discovered that this lady had turned her back on me and called me all sorts of horrible names. Slandering my image for no good reason when all I ever showed her was love.

This really hurt me and made me ponder deeply on certain things. Is it a sin to be good? Does helping other women truly spell doom?. Up till now, I haven’t been able to place a finger on what I did wrong to this lady but she chose to repay me with so much hatred and spiteful words.

After going through this horrible encounter, the tendency to stop doing good may exist but I have decided otherwise. I will not allow one horrible experience to stop me from doing good, needless to say it should change my already formed character. In other words, people will always talk positive or negative and you should never allow the poor actions of others change who you are. If they are not smart enough to appreciate you then that’s their loss and not yours.

I believe this story will resonate with someone who at one time or the other has faced a disheartening situation and questioned the reason for doing good. Also, this platform is great for finding encouragement because we sometimes face negative comments and sleazy remarks that could put a damper on things

I have decided to continue to do good. I will continue to support, encourage and lend a helping hand to other women I meet whether in the workplace or on this platform. I will continue as a world pulse ambassador because it affords me an unending opportunity to be relevant. I will never limit myself. I will be a shining light.

No matter what, let us continue to do good. It’s my decision, our decision.

Happy International Women’s Day to all my beautiful sisters!!!

 

 

 

This story was submitted in response to Change Starts With a Story.

Comments 15

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Jill Langhus
Mar 10
Mar 10

Hi Uduak,

Thanks for sharing your sad, but inspiring story. I'm sorry you recently had this experience. I'm glad, though, that you have decided to stay true to yourself, however, and not let it diminish your light and who you are. We never know what's going on with other people. I've had this experience quite a few times, and it does hurt, and I'm always left wondering why. It does put me off wanting to help and empower others, but ultimately at the end of the day, I pride myself for having a loving and authentic heart and I realize that how they treat others is about what's going on with them and nothing to do with me. Sometimes it takes awhile to realize this, but in my heart I know this to be the case. Please always stay true to yourself and continue spreading the love and joy in your heart. The world could do with more of it.

Hope you had a great IWD, dear!

uduakedet
Mar 10
Mar 10

Awww. Thanks so much for your kind words. I had a fantastic day yesterday. Regards.

Jill Langhus
Mar 10
Mar 10

You're very welcome, dear! Awesome. Great to hear!

Hope you have a great week!

Dawn Arteaga
Mar 10
Mar 10

I love this and fully agree. I try to revisit my professional success metrics every year and one of the areas I love to track is how many young people have I recommended for positions/advanced studies over the years. It’s such a great feeling to know you have given someone a hand up - and even better when they far surpass your successes. Recently I had the honor of attending a book reading by the first woman I ever supervised. I shudder to think of all the mistakes I made guiding her in my early days but I’m grateful she trained me as a manager and has since gone on to be a hugely successful professional. I am sorry you had a bad experience with someone you mentored but don’t let it bring you down! She probably has other battles that are making her act that way. Keep shining your light!!

uduakedet
Mar 10
Mar 10

Thanks you so much Dawn. Wonderful to read about your experience

Hello, Uduak,

It’s really a humbling experience to mentor young women and then they become the best version of themselves.

Just today a young woman told me how influential I was in her life since she was a student, then a professional, then as a newly married wife. I never thought I impacted her life, but it feels great to know.

Congratulations for being a great mentor to women around you! Sorry about some relationships that didn’t work well.

uduakedet
Mar 13
Mar 13

Thank you very much Karen

Olutosin
Mar 13
Mar 13

You are a great woman. Some people are ingrates, but God is our reward.

uduakedet
May 14
May 14

Thank you so much Tosin

Bettina Amendi
Mar 18
Mar 18

My sister Uduak,human beings are strange creatures including me.Therefore when caught up in such a situation hang on to DESIDERATA
https://www.worldpulse.com/en/community/users/bettina-amendi/posts/90108

uduakedet
May 14
May 14

You are so right Bettina, thanks for taking time to reply my message

Lisbeth
Mar 19
Mar 19

Happy international women day to you too. Well done and thanks for sharing.

uduakedet
May 14
May 14

Thank you too Sis

uduakedet
May 14
May 14

Just sent you an email

Bettina Amendi
May 24
May 24

Let me check.