The best revenge is to live a happy and successful life

Urmila Chanam
Posted September 18, 2019 from India

Synopsis of my interview:

The Feminifesto Podcast, The Red Elephant Foundation, Breaking the Silence Campaign, Breaking the Silence Worldwide Foundation, Menstrual Hygiene Management, Women's Empowerment, Domestic Violence, Court Case, Litigation, Justice for Women, Experience of Domestic Violence Victims(Women and Children), Single mother, humanitarian work.

18th September, 2019, Bengaluru, India. The only time I ever broke down in tears in the 10 years I have lived after fighting a domestic violence case was in this interview for Feministo Podcast with Red Elephant Foundation. The reason was I felt understood and when you find acceptance and empathy, it's like coming home. I have been strong for so many years, I needed to cry once for myself and what the person inside of me has gone through. From having suffered in the closest relationship a person will ever have in their life(marriage), being a single mum, relocating from a small town to one of the fastest growing cities in India, adjusting, finding my footing in different industries, creating my niche, learning to trust people again and making friends, healing, using my personal experiences to shape my humanitarian work and the deep joy that is part of my life now were what I discussed in this interview. This interview was taken by Kirthi Jayakumar and Vaishnavi Pallapothu.

The interview: 

https://castbox.fm/episode/Episode-25-Urmila-Chanam-id1427609-id17663102...

The Red Elephant Foundation is a civilian peacebuilding initiative aiming at building gender equal and non-violent futures through education, advocacy for policy change, and tech-for-good. The Feminifesto Podcast brings together and presents stories of women in different fields.

This story was submitted in response to GirlForce: Unscripted and Unstoppable.

Comments 26

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Jill Langhus
Sep 18
Sep 18

Hi Urmila,

Thanks for sharing your lovely photos, post and interview link. Hopefully I'll have time to listen to this later as I'm sure it's so inspiring and interesting. You two are too cute, by the way:-)

Hope you're having a great day and week!

XX

Urmila Chanam
Sep 18
Sep 18

Sister Jill, thanks for your kind words. Love, love, love

Jill Langhus
Sep 20
Sep 20

You're welcome, dear:-)

Hope you have a fab weekend!

XX

Omoh Virginie
Sep 18
Sep 18

There's always beauty in starting afresh no matter what difficulties faced. I'm glad you could find it sister.

You guys look so cute.

Urmila Chanam
Sep 18
Sep 18

I agree that beginning is always infused with hope. I am glad I took that decision though at that time I was always thinking if this is the right decision or not. Thanks for reading :)

Lisbeth
Sep 18
Sep 18

Hello :-),
Thanks for sharing your past challenges with us. I also like your pictures. She is now a big girl. At least the burdens are much less i supposed. It's okay to cry, I do that once in a while when the need arises.
Pls have a good day and take care.
Regards

Urmila Chanam
Sep 18
Sep 18

We are very happy and enjoying our lives together. There isn't a person born who will never see hardships; what is important is how you use it as a stepping stone to a better life. Thanks a lot for reading; so grateful xoxo

Anita Shrestha
Sep 18
Sep 18

Hi Urmila Jee
Thank you for sharing. Your high spirit always influnce other.

Urmila Chanam
Sep 18
Sep 18

Anita do you know that its been one year since the Ripple Academy and Women's Earth Alliance and United Religion's Initiative got us together to strengthen our environment related programs? You are missed dearly.

Anita Shrestha
Sep 19
Sep 19

Yes

ANJ ANA
Sep 18
Sep 18

Dear Urmila,
Sending you warm love and tight hugs my sister...
Thank you for sharing the link of your interview, I will surely listen to it.
and one thing, It's completely fine to cry...... it's a natural thing of expression like we laugh, smile, shout, be happy, be angry and be sad, etc.... I do it very often and believe me, its the best way to let go of the things with the tears, it feels completely comfort after crying.
Love and regards,
anjana

Urmila Chanam
Sep 18
Sep 18

Thanks a lot for the affection and warmth. I can't say how grateful I am for that. I love World Pulse for this precise reason where women are so understanding and giving.

ANJ ANA
Sep 18
Sep 18

I just listened to your interview and so good to know more about you. You are so resourceful and an inspiration to women. Your rich experience will be very helpful for the member of world pulse. Keep your spirit up as always. love and regards,
av

Urmila Chanam
Sep 19
Sep 19

Thanks a lot sister for listening and for your kind words. Love can heal people.

SIMON MUREU
Sep 19
Sep 19

Thank you for this and hope to go for podcast soon

Urmila Chanam
Sep 19
Sep 19

Please do my brother. How are you doing?

SIMON MUREU
Sep 24
Sep 24

DOING ALRIGHT HERE IN KENYA.tHANKS

Hello, my beloved sister Urmila,

It's possible to listen to the interview without downloading Castbox. I'm wiping my tears as I write this comment. I couldn't imagine you've gone through so much pain. Yes, I read some of those on World Pulse, but hearing you speak about it with your voice trying to control your tears made me admire you all the more. Just like Kirthi said, I want to hug you after that vulnerable sharing of your humble beginning.

Wow, look at you now. You've become a globally-awarded, sought-after woman leader. Your life brings so much encouragement to me especially when you mentioned how much you loved writing and you're not a trained journalist. Thank you for winning the battles life threw at you. Thank you for using your painful experiences to create healthy environments for women to be who they are. Your existence is a gift to every woman in this world.

Hugs, dear sister. I'm soooo proud of you. I feel so honored to be called your sister. You have your revenge now because you live a happy, successful, and influential life.

Keep up the great work!

Urmila Chanam
Sep 19
Sep 19

My precious Karen, how blessed I am to receive your love, understanding and encouragement. If every woman/person receives these three things in their lives, we will never be short of the will to endure and last our difficulties and find the beautiful life that awaits for us.

Awww. You are so sweet, sister. Thank you for your kind words. It’s a pleasure to encourage you. Hope you have a great day!

Olutosin
Sep 19
Sep 19

Thats my mantra.
Welldone Angel.

Urmila Chanam
Sep 19
Sep 19

Dear sister Olutosin,
That is the reason we get along so well; we are similar :)
Love and hugs,
Urmila Chanam

Sep 20
Sep 20
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Sep 21
Sep 21
This comment has been removed by the commenter or a moderator.
Tarke Edith
Sep 21
Sep 21

Hello sister
Yes indeed if you want to stay happy don't revenge
Thanks for sharing.

Urmila Chanam
Sep 21
Sep 21

Dear Tarke,
I agree with you that revenge has never brought anyone any joy but in the context of my experience, I meant the opposite. I mean that instead of dwelling in the wrongs that happened to you, its better to find a happy life, do well in your profession, be happy in your relationships, focus on your health than remain trapped in the past.
Love and prayers,
Urmila Chanam