MY MONTHLY VISITOR

CHIOMA EVANGELINE OKAFOR
Posted May 30, 2017 from Nigeria

It was during a long vacation holiday after my thirteenth birthday at my Uncle's place. I woke up and noticed the whole bed was soaked with blood. Oh God! could it be my period I shouted. I was so scared at the amount of blood stain on the bedspread. I had to start washing the stains off before my Uncle's wife wakes up. I threw away my pant and use the tissue paper throughout the four days it lasted.

When I traveled back home, I told my Mother, she was happy but left me scared with her advice " Chioma she called me; NEVER ALLOW A MAN TOUCH OR NEAR YOU WHEN YOU ARE ON! You are now a full grown woman who can get pregnant when touched by a man. Is this what I got myself into, I exclaimed. My mother gave me napkins cut into two and instructed me to use it whenever I see it again. Did I forget to mention that I was NEVER told it can come at the beginning, middle orend of the month depending on your cycle. Innocent me kept on waiting for the end of next month to welcome my visitor with my new napkins. I was embarrassed when it came out on the eight day of the next month.

I started avoiding men like a plague especially when my visitor is around I remembered shouting atthe young man who sat next to me in the bus not to near me because am not ready to welcome a baby. This went on till my Aunt was embarrassed the day I refused to sit in the middle of two men in a commercial bus. My Auntwas the one who taught me I can't get pregnant by a mere touch of a man.

I advocate mothers should teach their daughters all they need to know about their body and our monthly visitor.

This post was submitted in response to Period Talk.

Comments 11

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mae me
May 30, 2017
May 30, 2017

Hi Chioma, thank you for sharing your experience.  

CHIOMA EVANGELINE OKAFOR
Jun 28, 2017
Jun 28, 2017

Thank you sister.

Sherna Alexander Benjamin
Jun 05, 2017
Jun 05, 2017

Sister Chioma,

Thank you for encouraging mothers to speak with their daughters informing them about the Menstrual cycle. The fact remains if mothers are not educated they cannot educate their daughters and myths and misconceptions will continue. A woman's period is nothing to be afraid of nor should it bring segregation and stigmatisation.

It should be embraced and celebrated. May you continue using your voice to effect change and to educate individuals, communities and a nation. Keep on speaking my sister.

CHIOMA EVANGELINE OKAFOR
Jun 28, 2017
Jun 28, 2017

Thank you for the encouragement dear Sis 

REHEMA CIZA
Jun 12, 2017
Jun 12, 2017

Je vous remercie d'informer les mamans à parler avec leurs filles sur le cycle menstruel,car on dit" qu'éduquer une femme c'est éduquer toute une nation".

CHIOMA EVANGELINE OKAFOR
Jun 28, 2017
Jun 28, 2017

Merci ma soeur.

moses
Jun 13, 2017
Jun 13, 2017

Thank you for share that brilliant message towards mothers,its true ,mothers have that responsibility to talk to young girls as they are developing because girls incur a number of changes on their bodies and menstruation is one of them.they need to be told how handle and react to such changes when they surface to them and the first person is the mother.

Thank you.

Kisakye Moses

  

CHIOMA EVANGELINE OKAFOR
Jun 28, 2017
Jun 28, 2017

Let's spread the news Sister.

Tamarack Verrall
Jun 13, 2017
Jun 13, 2017

Dear Chioma,

Your story breaks the silence and the unknown so well. By sharing what you were and were not told you make it easier for others to share as well. Your call for mothers to speak openly with daughters is such an important part of our collective work to have our bleeding understood and honoured, not hidden behind myth and silence. Without our bleeding there would be no humanity at all. Your story dissolves the silence powerfully. 

In sisterhood,

Tam

CHIOMA EVANGELINE OKAFOR
Jun 28, 2017
Jun 28, 2017

Thank you Sister. I hope to write more.

Rakhshinda Shakir
Jul 19, 2017
Jul 19, 2017

Awwww! So cute of you to get scared. A strong message to every individuals out there. :)