Sometimes I feel guilty about the amount of time I spend thinking about things that, when I sit back and look at the bigger picture, probably shouldn't be so important. But lately my brain has been obsessing over my relationship with my boyfriend. And more broadly, how love is (should be?) expressed in a romantic relationship. I still feel like I need to apologize for the superficiality of this post, but I thought I would turn my confused heart and mind over to my fellow PulseWire sisters and ask you: How is romantic love expressed in your country? I know every relationship is different and every person expresses things in a different way, but so often it appears to me that after a man has wooed a woman, after he has "gotten her" so to speak, he decides that he doesn't have to make an effort anymore. Even if he "loves" her, he doesn't need to do anything special to express is. This, at least, has been my experience. Has it been yours? Do men in your country pursue women, looking for victory, and then when the challenge is over they appear to get bored or become apathetic about the relationship? My boyfriend tells me he loves me pretty much every day. I believe he does, but I don't see any real expressions or actions of it. He did at the beginning of our relationship. This is how I can recognize that they aren't there anymore. And I guess I've just become so curious if women everywhere experience this, or is it just in North America where the men become complacent with their expressions of love! Again, I know I'm speaking in generalities, and for that I apologize, but I'd really love to hear any comments about this question. Thanks for reading!

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Hi Dear,

Expression of love is individualistic in my country, why I am saying this is because we are patriarchal in nature and when you express the secret happening between you and your boyfriend, people may not really believe you Culturally, it is expected that a lady should not have a say in any relationship, the man cuts the shot but most times it is not the reality, we always say, we know how to handle our men.

Some irresponsible men how out to conquer and make jest of the lady immediately it is over, this when you see them behaving responsibly but relaxing immediately the lady is counted among his preys, intelligent women are always vigilant, because these days, some Nigerian women are proving the men folk wrong, what they can do we can even do better.

So ladies are actually watching before leaping.

Olutosin Oladosu Adebowale Founder/Project Coordinator Star of Hope Transformation Centre 512 Road F Close Festac Town Lagos-Nigeria https: