Sexual harassment and rape in school milieu

“Obedience before complain” is a doctrine within my community used to emphasize the importance of respect. This doctrine has greatly been used as a weapon to silence many victims in cause of abuse where the abuser is in a position of power.

Discussing with my peers about our school days a few months ago, we touched the issue of discipline which was really hard and our school greatly celebrated for its “high standard” of discipline. This landed us in to examining our teachers and rating their level of discipline and congratulating them on how well they molded us in to who we are today. There was this head of our school who was practically leading in the rating exercise that if we were to give an award of excellence it will be undeniably him first.

Just in the middle of this joyous conversation, one of us decided to break the silence. She asked “are you planning to reward Mr X for the fact that he took away my virginity in his office at the age of 14 or the four crude abortions I had for him which has left me barren?” This came as a bomb explosion. The group chat went dead for a while. I couldn’t believe what I just heard about a man we knew as very strict and a great disciplinarian.

As if a balloon full of pressure just exploded many other female classmates started telling their experience of sexual harassment and eventual multiple rape instances from this same teacher and many other male teachers. After listening to the different tales recounted I could now make sense of the slangs of one of my teachers who used to say “ sally you are not a big girl” “you are selfish” “is it that you understand my lessons so well that you can’t pass by my house for me to give you extra lessons?” “you talk too and can’t keep a secret” and many more. I now understood his intention was to make me guilty so that he can have his way. The pain shared by these girls made it obvious that we were vulnerable. It equally highlighted the wickedness of the teachers whom we considered as role models. Regrettably, our parents trust this group of persons more than us their children which made any attempt to speak up useless since nobody will believe you.

This incident only came to confirm the fact that rape and sexual abuse in general in the school milieu is an evil that society is yet to identify especially in a developing country like Cameroon where child’s rights are yet to be understood and respected by many. I quickly remembered a little student in form one who came to my office and reported a teacher who took her to nearby bush during school hours and tried to violate her. Although I went against my principle by just telling the teacher to apologise to the child, other administrators blamed me for “belittling” a teacher in front of a “mere” student. What really frustrated me was the role the father of this little girl played. The father being a law enforcement officer takes up the teacher and tries to extort money without passing through my office to get the details of what happened. At the end envelopes changed hands and the matter died.

These two scenarios have been haunting my spirit and I can’t seem to rest. I need answers to the following questions: how can I break this culture of silence within the school milieu on issues of sexual harassment and abuse? How do I help the students to know their rights so that the “doctrine of obedience before complain” will not apply? How do I bring in parents to know the crucial role they have to play in protecting their children from sexual abuse?  I have got the answer which is to carry out a massive sensitization of students, teachers, parents and law enforcement authorities to take the challenge of making our schools and society as a whole a safe space for all.

I envision a school setting wherein power relations do not fan sexual harassment but rather harness real discipline, mentorship and role modeling to help children especially girls reach their full potentials.

“Obedience before complain” is a doctrine within my community used to emphasize the importance of respect. This doctrine has greatly been used as a weapon to silence many victims in cause of abuse where the abuser is in a position of power.

Discussing with my peers about our school days a few months ago, we touched the issue of discipline which was really hard and our school greatly celebrated for its “high standard” of discipline. This landed us in to examining our teachers and rating their level of discipline and congratulating them on how well they molded us in to who we are today. There was this head of our school who was practically leading in the rating exercise that if we were to give an award of excellence it will be undeniably him first.

Just in the middle of this joyous conversation, one of us decided to break the silence. She asked “are you planning to reward Mr X for the fact that he took away my virginity in his office at the age of 14 or the four crude abortions I had for him which has left me barren?” This came as a bomb explosion. The group chat went dead for a while. I couldn’t believe what I just heard about a man we knew as very strict and a great disciplinarian.

As if a balloon full of pressure just exploded many other female classmates started telling their experience of sexual harassment and eventual multiple rape instances from this same teacher and many other male teachers. After listening to the different tales recounted I could now make sense of the slangs of one of my teachers who used to say “ sally you are not a big girl” “you are selfish” “is it that you understand my lessons so well that you can’t pass by my house for me to give you extra lessons?” “you talk too and can’t keep a secret” and many more. I now understood his intention was to make me guilty so that he can have his way. The pain shared by these girls made it obvious that we were vulnerable. It equally highlighted the wickedness of the teachers whom we considered as role models. Regrettably, our parents trust this group of persons more than us their children which made any attempt to speak up useless since nobody will believe you.

This incident only came to confirm the fact that rape and sexual abuse in general in the school milieu is an evil that society is yet to identify especially in a developing country like Cameroon where child’s rights are yet to be understood and respected by many. I quickly remembered a little student in form one who came to my office and reported a teacher who took her to nearby bush during school hours and tried to violate her. Although I went against my principle by just telling the teacher to apologise to the child, other administrators blamed me for “belittling” a teacher in front of a “mere” student. What really frustrated me was the role the father of this little girl played. The father being a law enforcement officer takes up the teacher and tries to extort money without passing through my office to get the details of what happened. At the end envelopes changed hands and the matter died.

These two scenarios have been haunting my spirit and I can’t seem to rest. I need answers to the following questions: how can I break this culture of silence within the school milieu on issues of sexual harassment and abuse? How do I help the students to know their rights so that the “doctrine of obedience before complain” will not apply? How do I bring in parents to know the crucial role they have to play in protecting their children from sexual abuse?  I have got the answer which is to carry out a massive sensitization of students, teachers, parents and law enforcement authorities to take the challenge of making our schools and society as a whole a safe space for all.

I envision a school setting wherein power relations do not fan sexual harassment but rather harness real discipline, mentorship and role modeling to help children especially girls reach their full potentials.