I Survived Online Harassment, Abuse and Exploitation

Going to bed early had become a routine for me. Getting up late at night was my new habit.

As usual, I slept with the alarm on, set to ring at 2 am. In my dream I will be working hard on my project and suddenly the alarm will get me up: It was time to start navigating and to do my research online.

This was 4 years ago, when I just began working on line. At that time the internet connection was very unstable and not reliable, in addition the cost was not affordable. Consequently, I had to go to bed early, so that I could stay up late at night to access the internet. At this time the connectivity was faster and there was a cheaper plan for subscribers. More to that, my kids will be all asleep and the atmosphere will be cool and quite.

Before 2013 I was not frequent on social media, at that time I had not yet discovered the relevance of digital technology. It all started in 2014 when I was selected for the Techwomen program, it became very necessary for me to be regular on social media. I needed to connect with my organizing team, my peers and also check regular updates on social media. In that same year I also got enrolled on a Master’s program, so I had to do regular research on my topic.

Being connected to the whole world at that time of the day got me exposed to online violence, harassment and exploitation. Every night I received at least 5 new messages from guys telling me how I looked very beautiful and sexy.

One Friday night, I remember a man really insulting me seriously because I asked him to stop harassing me because I had had enough of it. After doing that he blocked me on face book. This left me in deep pain and agony especially because I did not know where and to whom to express myself. Social media was new to me and I really got scared about it. The content of his messages was mostly geared towards wanting an intimate friendship with me at all cost and later sexual relationship. I was bitter about it and I wanted to quit.

Nowadays online bullying has become very common and a medium for scamming. Sad to say that women are the most vulnerable victims of such malpractices.

According to recent global research by the UN, 9 million women have experienced a form of cyber violence and are 27 times more likely to be abused online than men. Of the girls surveyed globally, only 13% strongly agree that the Internet is a safe space to express their opinions and 1 in 5 women feel the Internet is inappropriate for them.

In another incident, some other guys presented false profiles seeking for fake collaboration and partnership with me. They pretended to like my project. It is very embarrassing when someone starts talking about collaborating on a project and later on deviates to harassment and bullying when you do not comply with their intended plan.

Exploitation and trolling are serious problems that impact our girls suffering from the brunt of the danger associated to social media and mobile technology. Many women are facing hostile and oppressive situations online. Faced with this aggression and few available remedies, many are choosing to simply opt out of online life to escape this abuse.

I am a victim of gender based trolling and bullying. Today am very concerned about protecting women and girls online. Our daughters need to be safeguarded against these risks related to social media. Making the internet a safe place for women and girls will be of great importance. We must take necessary steps to seek support and advice on creating safer web environments. Also providing supporting resources will empower mothers and girls to seek help through the correct channels for appropriate training and support.

My personal experience has made me become more resilient against exploitation and grooming. I no longer suffer from harassment, hate speech and threats of exploitation. Empowering mothers to be internet and social media savvy is key is combating the issue of online grooming and safeguarding girls.

I always educate the girls I work with about the emerging dangers of the web and mobile technology. I train girls on how to live a positive relationship with the internet and mobile technology. Women and girls need to make the most out of the power of the internet through education and information.

The internet needs to be made safe for women and girls to freely participate on the web through skills and experiences that will allow them to build their capacity.

How to Get Involved

Hosting knowledge sharing events. .

Empowering mothers and daughters to be internet and social media savvy.

Providing supporting resources to empower mothers and girls to seek help through the correct channels for appropriate training and support.