The Toughest Period in My Life

It all started 5 years ago when I had a deep reflection about blending my career objectives and my passion in life. At this time I had been married for nine years with three kids with one more on the way. I came to realized that my professional career had taken a toll and as a result it had stayed stagnant for long. I was getting depressed as I could not believe that I was at same spot due to family obligations and responsibility.

Growing up as a young girl I had always been ambitious, forward looking and ready to learn in order to upgrade my situation. I hated to fold my arms and wanting to someone to help me out on my activities.

I remembered my mother’s advice before I got married. That was fifteen years ago, she told me that a woman’s power lies in her education. Adding that education is an immense and determining wealth for a women especially in Africa. She added “Knowledge surpasses silver and gold”.

I had a flash back as these words echoed on my mind and I decided to go back to school to further my education.

I began preparing my application for a Master’s degree program in Water Resources Management at the University of Dschang, Western Region of Cameroon. I decided to share my ambitions with my husband. My first thoughts were that he will not like the idea. But to my greatest surprise he encouraged me to apply and he promised to sponsor my education.

That was a good start, but the next issue was that I was heavily pregnant at the time I sent my application and my baby was due for the next month. After 4 months, I received an email confirming my selection for the program. I had to travel to Dschang with my 3months old baby girl to complete the admission process.

Feeling very worried, I visited one of my aunts who had had a similar experience, to share my story with her. She encouraged me using her own story that inspired me and from that day I developed the right motivation to face my situation.

On a Monday morning I travelled to the university with my baby in my arms, getting on campus I went straight to the notice board to have more information. Some other students around looked at me very strangely. I could read many questions on their faces.

I looked at the list of 30 names of candidates that were selected and I found out that I was the only female on the class list. I was sad and felt bad. I said to myself “When shall this situation ever change?” At all levels we find the same imbalance. Feeling very discouraged, I went to the office of the Head of Department (HoD) to introduce myself to him.

With my baby in my arms, warmly wrapped up, I got into his office. He gazed at me for a while, looking very puzzled, without uttering any word. I introduced myself and explained why I had come. Then he asked: “How are you going to manage both your studies and your baby… we have no child care center here.”

Feeling very frustrated I told him that I had come just to have more information about the program and the time table. After giving me all the information I needed I headed back home.

Classes began two weeks but I did not report on campus to begin my studies simply because I was confused. I had to face one of the toughest times in my life. Looking for a solution, I called my mother to come over and help me out with the baby. We had a lengthy discussion and we decided that my aunty who was not too occupied will come over to assist me in taking care of the baby.

Finally, I went to school late, in the third week of classes. Now I faced the next challenge of staying away from my baby. I felt it most when it was bed time. I wept every night. Oh dear me!

Many class mates saw me for the first time and they very excited to have one women in their mist. I interacted with them for a while and later developed a good companionship with them. One day during break one of them asked me “Madame are you the lady that the HoD described in class the other day…?” I asked him to tell me more about the description given them by the HoD and he continued ‘He said you came to his office with a baby in your arms and you want to study as well.” I told them I was the one and I added that I was very determined to have my Master’s degree at the same time with them. From that day I took up the challenge and stoop up for success in my education.

Finally, I completed in two years. My peers were very encouraged by my story and most of them also decided to further their education. Now, women come to me for advice. Though the path was rough, I was successful because of the support and encouragement I received from my family. I believe that women have to step out of their limiting and unfulfilling traditional roles created by society and move barriers in order to be the change they want to see in the world.

How to Get Involved

Encourage other women in same situation 

You can share a similar story that will lift women up.