My dream is to be the President of Nigeria in 2015 so that I will be buoyant enough to purchase the biggest generator in China that will supply uninterrupted power supply to members of my family. Also I will be able to cruise around in presidential jet to avoid dangerous potholes on our roads, to afford exorbitant medical bills in hospital abroad a good solution to Nigeria stinking government hospitals, and to be able to build my own University, High, primary and nursery schools in my backyard, I hate these collapsed educational system in Nigeria with unrecognized certificates in developed countries. Yes, to be the president and every billionaire will seek my daughters hand in marriage, I will be powerful enough to kill anyone that stand on my path. Lastly I will be able to afford dog’s meal, I saw the advert in my teacher’s old newspaper, he said it costs several dollars whereas a dollar can buy a full bag of cocoyam, when I become the Nigeria President I will be able to eat dog’s meal imported from the United States of America, yes, yes yes!
I do not know the creator of this world, but I know and experience the differences in this world, the haves and the have nots, why the sole of my feet remains my sandal because I learn that some children have different shoes and know color combination, but my feet fits every cloth I wear, thank God I am black and I think that color matches every color. Do you hear that some children ride to school in bus? Though I have a box I usually carry on my head, it is made of iron heavier than my books but mother says it lasts longer than bags, mother is always correct you know.
Travelling to school is a great exercise, I cover miles daily on foot carrying my iron box on my head all because I want to learn a liberating western education, but the strains experienced by my little bones causes uncontrollable sleep and snoring in class, our teacher sleeps and snores in class too, he has his own journey to cover on foot too. My dear passionate teacher! He loves discussing world news, who knows his gains in the news; his best discussion is world politics and the fast approaching change. The city electric too, a good subject but it is disappointing that the poles erected in the village for the past ten years generate no light and the poles are so high that villagers cannot spread clothes on them, I still cannot comprehend electric poles without light and can still not serve other purposes.
Teacher believes that the poles will lighten the village, give a new lease of life, introduce the devil’s box that speaks, oh and those cartoon characters he draws on the chalk board, I wish we can watch this in the village too. His words are contradictory, because he still said commissioning this light does not guarantee steady supply of power! Some cities with electricity have no light too. It is even funny that the inscription on the poles read danger zone do not touch, what danger is in a useless poles with no current, who can understand these adults?
Few years back the whole village was thrown into pandemonium, it was vote or veto spree, adults were electing or selecting representatives, who came to promise us heaven and hell, after the election they became strangers, we only hear their sirens these days.
The only dispensary serving these seven villages is a journey that covers several miles and the sole nurse there has only phensic a brand of pain reliever and gentian violet for wounds, on several occasions we had to return home to boil herbs and cover up with blankets because her prescribed drugs can only be accessed in the big city, but my friend said the nurse kept some plasters and cotton wool but for sale, life is strange, mother said they vote in good people but powerful men vetoed in their candidates, that our votes do not count, may be they should employ our teacher to count the votes, he is a good Mathematician, he even understand the uncountable.
The outcome of my educational career sends shivers through my spine, teacher says we will not be able to compete with our counterparts in developed nations, I wonder why wasting so much energy, resources and time on fruitless efforts, teacher said our leaders are afraid to develop our educational sector because their children are dunce and we would compete with them favorably if given good education, in order to keep that masses permanently down they destroy our educational system and send their children abroad for sound education.
Do you know about a computer that has the brain of a man? Teacher said they are in the cities but no poor man can afford them, why is god so partial, why should he create good product for some people and keep majority out of good things of life, if we have the brain box where do we plug it? Our electric poles were buried with ideas behind its creation. It is an irony because how can a good leader have a sound sleep with all round the clock light while his people have empty poles and ideas buried together for ten years?
Teacher even said that many Nigerian companies fold up and sacked their employee and relocated to other neighboring countries-this has no effect on my cocoyam, nobody can sack my parents from our farmland. The last time we were asked to think about our chosen career, everyone told the teacher point blank that we would love to be politicians, no one can sack a politician, you work less and earn more, it is the only lucrative job available now, there is no need for genuine certificate and my contribution is minimal though, teacher said the commonest phrase in Nigeria House of Assemblies is I concor, Immediately I wrote it down. Whatever that means but when I get there I will always remember. He said the sitting allowance of a senator feeds fifty widows a day and the inconvenience allowances can make life convenient for the fatherless- when there is no chance for the fatherful who is talking about the fatherless-with my parents beside me, I can hardly achieve anything talk less of an orphan. Our teacher is angry with everyone except us, he calls us leaders of tomorrow ha, and we are leaders of today only I have not been given any chance to live in Aso rock the seat of power. Can you believe that he is even angry with the President of America for saying the future of Africa is in the hands of African, is it not the truth? But teacher was actually thinking that President Obama would visit our village, he was with his transistor radio most of the time during the latter’s visit to Ghana, I wanted to ask if teacher voted for President Obama but I have loads of questions that I must not spill out. Teacher marked his diary till President Obama came to Africa, but was disappointed with what his speech, how I wish my teacher would be jotting down our Pastor’s sermon the way he jotted down President Obama’ speech?
What is Halliburton saga? How can developed countries connive with Nigeria political and economic leaders to pillage the country, the new topic is involvement in corrupt practices to the tune of US$180Million and America refused to publish names of American and Nigerian officials involved in the scam despite the out of court settlement with the company, I do not understand this grammar but I will love good publishers in America to publish this names so that my teacher can be at peace with America.
But is President Obama is to visit our village, which road leads to the village will he ride motorbike of motorcycle? All those potholes that show that we are forsaken will drive him back, the problem with International visitors to Nigeria is that they really wan to be identified with the affluent not once will they decide on their own to visit us, but do you know that population wise we are more than the minority few they prefer visiting, only International NGOs volunteers visit our people and identify with the masses, may God bless them. Teacher has a lot of complaints, too much reading makes one mad, he said in ten years time the popular motorbike riders who have taken over our roads because of the unmotorable potholes will suffer from unidentified diseases, he even said that Orthopedics hospitals in the cities have no space for motorbike accident victims, these days the patients are attended to on the floor no available beds, at least I sleep on the floor too, what is new about accident victims sleeping on the floor in hospitals at least there are no germs on hospital floor, no germs can survive with the stench that causes uncontrollable vomit whenever one visits those hospitals, I believe every hospital in the world smells.
Do you believe that Nigeria is contributing to deplorable situation of ozone layers, I do not know the meaning but teacher is always confusing this with climate change and environmental sustainability, what has the fume of generator got to do with this, teacher said some household in the cities have more than ten generators in a building, I do not want to know ozone layer but if someone in our village can afford generator I will even move into his house and sleep with the generator as long as I can watch television and cartoon.
Thank God for blessing us with a passionate teacher who reads and shares everything his class and keep the community abreast with happenings around the world. Change is fast approaching all over the world but he said it is strange it is not affecting our country. I am the change Nigeria is waiting for, I need no vote but a staunch promise to cover the tracks of past leaders, if I decide to follow the leftists I know there will not be any chance for me except it is our teacher who counted the votes, he advised that Nigerians should monitor election with camera, thank God his voice does not pass the village square, and President Yar Adua whose own election is marred with irregularities cannot conduct a free and fair election.
I want to rule this great nation, my fervent prayer is that this entity called Nigeria will still be in one peace when I am old enough to rule, our leaders are cutting the national cake with knife, munching and pouring the crumbs on their chest like toddlers but I am sharpening my sword already, hope that cake remains during my regime as everyone continues to pray. Long Live the Federal Republic of Nigeria.