Polygamy should be a fair game!

Marital issues have been one of the most delicate issues that women face in my community ranging from teenage marriages to inherited wives and most particularly polygamy. Polygamy is a common practice in Africa at large and in my community in particular. In my community most people think polygamy means one man getting married to 2 or more wives. Hell No! it means either spouses get married to two or more partners. This has been a gender biased practice that has existed for a long time and the consequences had always been on the woman ranging from domestic violence to broken homes and marriages. I met Flora a 30years old lady who has 2 kids with the boyfriend but doesn’t want to be married because he insists on polygamy. And not polygamy as it is in real sense but polygamy in the African context.Meaning he has the right to bring in another wife. forgetting about polyandy which is also a form of polygamy. My mom came from a polygamous home where her father got married to 5 wives. Her mother was the first wife who was forced out of marriage by the violence that came in when the husband started coming in with his numerous wife’s. She grew up with her father and other wives where she faced all forms of domestic violence. Men claim to get into polygamy to show off because they think is a sign of wealth, some claim that if it’s a is of bad character woman they can always take in another woman. My big question is that what about the other way round! Can you create a scene in your mind where real polygamy is practiced where if a man gets a new wife the woman also gets a new man? Imagine the home. If I was given a chance to bring up a new culture I will simply get everyone informed about what polygamy is. I will let polygamy be a two way possibilities. If a man can bring another wife he should be able to stand he’s wife bringing another man and let the game continue. This will be a smart and natural way to end that bad practice of polygamy which is one of the major causes of domestic violence and gender discrimination.